How lucky that you two should meet,
And make each other's life complete.
Author: unknown
A wedding begins a new world,
As two hearts pledge one love,
And two lives join in one dream.
Author: unknown
You will say I do to one another
A vow, a promise, there will be no other
Remember your vows now and for always
Love each other for the rest of your days
Author: Harriet E. Coren
Came but for friendship, and took away love.
Author: - Thomas Moore -
Love knows no limit to its endurance
no end to its trust,
Love still stands
when all else has fallen.
Author: - 1 Corinthians 13:7-8 –
Marriage is a letting go,
A plunge into the deep.
No one need the currents fear
Nor hesitate to leap.
You may your spirits keep.
More is gained by giving up
And less by taking in.
Remember that to dwell in joy
You must make room within.
Author: unknown
Coming together on this special day
A journey you will be taking on life's highway.
Two hearts become one when you pledge your love
In front of family, friends, and God above.
Author: Linda Waymire
The path to happiness
is so narrow that two
cannot walk on it
unless they become one.
Author: unknown
Marriage is a home for love,
a corner for warmth,
a place for joy.
Marriage is a love that takes
A lifetime to express.
Author: unknown
To give love
With an open heart,
To honor love
As the rare gift it is,
To nuture love
As you would a tender seedling,
Is to know how to make love last.
Author: unknown
A wedding is the beautiful occasion
When two separate lives are blended into one,
When promises and dreams begin unfolding
And the journey of a marriage is begun.
Marriage is a weaving together of two lives ...
A creation of passion, artistry, and soul.
As long as you live and breathe,
It will continue to evolve into patterns
More intricate and more marvelous
Than either person could render alone.
Two become one,
not by giving up
the wonderful qualities
that makes them unique
individuals,
but by learning, growing,
and becoming whole together.
Love often and love much.
Love in the first light of dawn,
in the last flicker of dusk.
Love every touch, every word,
each stolen moment, each playful kiss
Love every chance to love and be loved.
Love long and love well.
Just love!
Love is the caring of
two hearts
the pairing of
two lives,
the sharing of
two souls.
Once in a lifetime,
right in the middle of an
ordinary life ...
Love writes a fairy tale.
Author: unknown
Two minds,
two pairs of hands,
two hearts,
two special wedding bands ...
two lives,
once mine and yours,
now one ...
one love ...
that’s all there is!
Author: unknown
May you always find shelter
in one another's arms...
May you always find warmth
in one another's touch...
May you always find love
in one another's heart
Author: unknown
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Wedding Quotes, part 1
We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours,
we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.
It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy the rest of your life.
we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.
It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy the rest of your life.
Sympathy Quotes
"Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal."
"In the night of death, hope sees a star, and listening love can hear the rustle of a wing. "
"While we are mourning the loss of our friend, others are rejoicing to meet him behind the veil. "
"Life is eternal, and love is immortal, and death is only a horizon; and a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight."
May you find comfort
in God’s love, peace
in His faithfulness
"In the night of death, hope sees a star, and listening love can hear the rustle of a wing. "
"While we are mourning the loss of our friend, others are rejoicing to meet him behind the veil. "
"Life is eternal, and love is immortal, and death is only a horizon; and a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight."
May you find comfort
in God’s love, peace
in His faithfulness
Praying that happy memories will soon replace the sadness in your heart.
"Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice but, for those who love time is eternity." -- Henry Van Dyke
Because you are so dear a friend,
your cares are my cares, too
And so as sorrow fills your heart,
my heart goes out to you,
And though my words cannot begin
to ease the loss you bear,
I only hope it helps, somehow,
to know how much I care.
For each thorn, there's a rosebud...
for each twilight — a dawn...
for each trial — the strength to carry on,
For each stormcloud — a rainbow...
for each shadow — the sun...
for each parting — sweet memories
when sorrow is done.
—Ralph Waldo Emerson
Cherished memories are the gifts
That help to keep us near
To those who live within our hearts
When they're no longer here.
It's sad when those whom we care for, leave,
For them, no question of choice.
And deep down inside, we silently grieve
For a still-remembered voice.
Life must go on; it is all that remains
For those left on earth below;
Try to smile, dry your tears, have courage…
You know they would wish it so.
Memories keep the one you loved close to you in spirit and thought and always in your heart.
When someone you love becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure.
Eskimo Legend
Perhaps
they are not
stars in the sky,
But rather
openings
where our
loved ones
shine down to
let us know
they are happy.
The tide recedes but leaves behind
Bright seashells on the sand.
The sun goes down but gentle warmth
Still lingers on the land.
The music stops, and yet it echos on
In sweet refrains
For every joy that passes
Something beautiful remains.
your cares are my cares, too
And so as sorrow fills your heart,
my heart goes out to you,
And though my words cannot begin
to ease the loss you bear,
I only hope it helps, somehow,
to know how much I care.
For each thorn, there's a rosebud...
for each twilight — a dawn...
for each trial — the strength to carry on,
For each stormcloud — a rainbow...
for each shadow — the sun...
for each parting — sweet memories
when sorrow is done.
—Ralph Waldo Emerson
Cherished memories are the gifts
That help to keep us near
To those who live within our hearts
When they're no longer here.
It's sad when those whom we care for, leave,
For them, no question of choice.
And deep down inside, we silently grieve
For a still-remembered voice.
Life must go on; it is all that remains
For those left on earth below;
Try to smile, dry your tears, have courage…
You know they would wish it so.
Memories keep the one you loved close to you in spirit and thought and always in your heart.
When someone you love becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure.
Eskimo Legend
Perhaps
they are not
stars in the sky,
But rather
openings
where our
loved ones
shine down to
let us know
they are happy.
The tide recedes but leaves behind
Bright seashells on the sand.
The sun goes down but gentle warmth
Still lingers on the land.
The music stops, and yet it echos on
In sweet refrains
For every joy that passes
Something beautiful remains.
Friends are needed both for joy and for sorrow. -Samuel Peterson
Golf Quotes
Golf quotes
That looks like very good exercise,
but what is the little white ball for?
"Fore" ever golfing
If it goes right, it's a slice,
if it goes left, it's a hook,
if it goes straight, it's a MIRACLE!
The uglier a man's legs are,
the better he plays golf.
It's almost a law.
We speak of eyeball-to-eyeball encounters
between men great and small. Even more
reaching and revealing of character is
the eyeball-to-golfball confrontation,
whereby our most secret natures are
mercilessly tested by a small, round,
whitish object with no mind or will but
with a very definite life of its own,
and with whims perverse and beatific.
Indeed, the highest pleasure of golf may
be that on the fairways and far from all
the pressures of commerce and rationality,
we can feel immortal for a few hours.
A bad day of golf is better than a good day at work.
Eat...sleep...golf.
Go play golf.
Go to the golf course.
Hit the ball.
Find the ball.
Repeat until the ball is in the hole.
Have fun.
The end.
It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits in
baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf
course.
OF COURSE everyone is GREEN at one time or another but the HOLE idea is to feel the DRIVE and not just PUTTER around. WOOD you rather have a CHIP on your shoulder or fly on the EAGLE's wings? Don't just CART around your BAG of BELOW PAR scores, FORE you are bound for SAND TRAPS. Join the CLUB. Have a BALL, and seek IRONY in life. The early BIRDie gets the worm. Don't get TEEd off! Just remember what BOGEY Beara might've said, "Put the heart before the GOLF COURSE." -Gina Marie Lauchner
Golf is 90 percent inspiration
and 10 percent perspiration
Golf is a game in which you yell FORE, shoot six, and write down five.
Golf is deceptively simple and endlessly complicated. It satisfies the soul and frustrates the intellect. It is at the same time rewarding and maddening-it is without a doubt the greatest game mankind has ever invented. Arnold Palmer
Golf is twenty percent mechanics and technique.
The other eighty percent is philosophy, humor,
tragedy, romance, melodrama, companionship,
camaraderie, cussedness, and conversation
Golf is an ineffectual attempt to direct an uncontrollable sphere into an inaccessible hole with instruments ill-adapted to the purpose.
--Winston Churchill
SAYINGS
1. Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle.
2. "I wish I could play my normal game...just once."
3. "Golf is harder than baseball. In golf, you have to play your foul balls."
4. If you find you do not mind playing golf in the rain, the snow, even during a hurricane, here's a valuable tip: your life is in trouble.
5. Golfers who try to make everything perfect before taking the shot rarely make a perfect shot.
6. The term "mulligan" is really a contraction of the phrase "maul it again."
7. A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers...neither of whom can putt very well.
8. An interesting thing about golf is that no matter how badly you play; it is always possible to get worse.
9. Golf's a hard game to figure. One day you'll go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you
go out and for no reason at all you really stink.
10. I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.
11. If your best shots are the practice swing and the "gimme Putt", you might wish to reconsider this game.
12. Achieving a certain level of success in golf is only important if you can finally enjoy the level you've reached after you've reached it.
13. Golf is the only sport where the most feared opponent is you.
14. Golf is like marriage: If you take yourself too seriously it won't work... and both are expensive.
15. The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil.
16. To some golfers, the greatest handicap is the ability to add correctly.
17. In golf, some people tend to get confused with all the numbers...they shoot a "six," yell "fore" and write "five".
18. Swing easy. Hit hard.
19. If you find yourself pleased that you locate more balls in the rough than you actually have lost, your focus is totally wrong and your
personality might not be right for golf...it is also just a matter of time before the IRS investigates your business.
20. Why is it twice as difficult to hit a ball over water than sand?
21. Golf! You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the ball goes right. The lowest score wins. And on top of that, the winner
buys the drinks.
Happiness is a long walk with a putter.
"I've always made a total effort, even when the odds seemed entirely against me. I never quit trying; I never felt that I didn't have a chance to win." -Arnold Palmer
Golf: "A game in which you claim the privileges of age, and retain the playthings of childhood." -Samuel Johnson
"Golf is like a love affair: If you don't take it seriously, it's not fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart." -Arnold Daly
"No matter what happens- never give up a hole...In tossing in your cards after a bad beginning you also undermine your whole game, because to quit between tee and green is more habit-forming than drinking a highball before breakfast." -Sam Snead
"Golf does strange things to other people, too. It makes liars out of honest men, cheats out of altruists, cowards out of brave men and fools out of everybody." -Milton Gross
"Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more about your foe than nineteen years of dealing with him across the desk." -Grantland Rice
"The fundamental problem with golf is that every so often, no matter how lacking you may be in the essential virtues required of a steady player, the odds are that one day you will hit the ball straight, hard, and out of sight. This is the essential frustration of this excruciating sport. For when you've done it once, you make the fundamental error of asking yourself why you can't do this all the time. The answer to this question is simple: the first time was a fluke." -Colin Bowles
"Talking to a golf ball won't do you any good. Unless you do it while your opponent is teeing off." -Bruce Lansky
"It's still good sportsmanship to not pick up lost balls while they are still rolling." -Mark Twain
"The older you get the stronger the wind gets- and it's always in your face." -Jack Nicklaus
"If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball." -Jack Lemmon
"When I'm on a golf course and it starts to rain and lightning, I hold up my one iron, 'caus I know even God can't hit a one iron." -Lee Trevino
"I'll always remember the day I broke ninety. I had a few beers in the clubhouse and was so excited I forgot to play the back nine." -Bruce Lansky
"As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round." -Ben Hogan
"My best score ever was 103, but I've only been playing 15 years." -Alex Karris
"Golf is the hardest game in the world to play, and the easiest to cheat at." -Dave Hill
"Never bet with anyone you meet on the first tee, who has a deep suntan, a one iron in his bag and squinty eyes." -Dave Marr
"The golf swing is like sex. You can't be thinking about the mechanics of the act while you are performing." -Dave Hill
"Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into a even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose." -Winston Churchill
"Relax? How can anybody relax and play golf? You have to grip the club don't you?" -Ben Hogan
"You don't know what pressure is until you've played for five dollars a hole with only two in your pocket."-Lee Trevino
"Golf is a game in which you yell 'fore', shoot six and write down five." -Paul Harvey
"A lot of guys who have have never choked, have never been in the position to do so." -Tom Watson
"I'm hitting the woods just great, but I'm having a terrible time getting out of them" -Harry Tofcano
"Golf is a game where guts and blind devotion will always net you absolutely nothing but an ulcer." -Tommy Bolt
"Golf is based on honesty, where else would you admit to a seven on a par three?" -Jimmy Demaret
"It's nice to have the opportunity to play for so much money, but it's nicer to win it." -Patty Sheenan
"I play with friends, but we don't play friendly games." -Ben Hogan
"Golf is an ideal diversion, but a ruinous disease." -Bertie Forbes
"Putts get real difficult the day they hand out the money." -Lee Trevino
"There are no points for style when it comes to putting. It's getting the ball in the cup that counts." -Brian Swarbrick
"Golf is twenty percent mechanics and technique. The other eighty percent is philosophy, humor, tragedy, romance, melodrama, companionship, camaraderie, cussedness, and conversation." -Grantland Rice
"The harder you work, the luckier you get." -Gary Player "Victory is everything. You can spend the money, but you can never spend the memories." -Ken Venturi
"Golf is 90 percent inspiration and 10 percent perspiration." -Johnny Miller
"The number one thing about trouble is...don't get into more." -Dave Stockton
"It's the most fun I've had with my clothes on." -Lee Trevino
"Mulligan: invented by an Irishman who wanted to hit one more twenty yard grounder." -Jim Bishop
"If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf." -Bob Hope
"The only shots you can be sure of are those you've had already." -Byron Nelson
"Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at it." -Jimmy Demaret
"Most golfers prepare for disaster. A good golfer prepares for success." -Bob Toski
"You've just one problem. You stand too close to the ball after you've hit it." -Sam Snead
"The fun you get from golf is in direct ratio to the effort you don't put into it." -Bob Allen
"Golf is good walk spoiled." -Mark Twain
"We have fifty-one golf courses in Palm Springs. He(Gerald Ford) never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot...At least he can't cheat on his score- because all you have to do is look back down the fairway and count the wounded." -Bob Hope
"You can't lose an old golf ball." -John Willis
"Indeed, the highest pleasure of golf may be that on the fairways and far from all the pressures of commerce and rationality, we can feel immortal for a few hours." -Colman McCarthy
"My game is so bad I gotta hire three caddies- one to walk the left rough, one for the right, and one for the middle. And the one in the middle doesn't have much to do." -Dave Hill
"When he gets the ball into a tough place, that's when he's most relaxed. I think it's because he has so much experience at it." -Don Christopher(Jack Lemmon's Caddie)
"A professional will tell you the amount of flex you need in the shaft of your club. The more the flex, the more strength you will need to break the thing over your knees." -Stephen Baker
"There are three ways of learning golf: by study, which is the most wearisome; by imitation, which is the most fallacious; and by experience, which is the most bitter." -Robert Browning
"Why am I using a new putter? Because the last one didn't float too well." -Craig Stadler
"Obviously a deer on the fairway has seen you tee off before and knows that the safest place to be when you play is right down the middle." -Jackie Gleason
"I'd like to see the fairways more narrow. Then everybody would have to play from the rough, not just me." -Seve Ballesteros
"We speak of eyeball-to-eyeball encounters between men great and small. Even more reaching and revealing of character is the eyeball-to-golfball confrontation, whereby our most secret natures are mercilessly tested by a small, round, whitish object with no mind or will but with a very definite life of its own, and with whims perverse and beatific." -John Stewart Martin
"Be funny on a golf course? Do I kid my best friend's mother about her heart condition?" -Phil Silvers
"The reason the golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing." -Phyllis Diller
"I'd give up golf if I didn't have so many sweaters." -Bob Hope
"The person I fear most in the last two rounds is myself." -Tom Watson
" Everybody has two swings-a beautiful practice swing and the choked-up one with with which they hit the ball. So it wouldn't do either of us a damned bit of good to look at your practice swing." -Ed Furgol
"If your caddie coaches you on the tee, 'Hit it down the left side with a little draw,' ignore him. All you do on the tee is try not to hit the caddie." -Jim Murray
"Always throw your clubs ahead of you. That way you don't have to waste energy going back to pick them up." -Tommy Bolt
"Always keep in mind that if God didn't want a man to have mulligans, golf balls wouldn't come three to a sleeve." -Dan Jenkins
"I know I'm getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators." -Gerald Ford
"Competitive golf is played mainly on a five-and-a-half-inch course, the space between your ears." -Bobby Jones
"Actually, the only time I ever took out a one iron was to kill a tarantula. And I took a seven to do that." -Jim Murry
"The right way to play golf is to go up and hit the bloody thing." -George Duncan
"If you pick up a golfer and hold it close to your ear, like a conch shell, and listen- you will hear an alibi." -Fred Beck
"He enjoys that perfect peace, that peace beyond all understanding, which comes at its maximum only to the man who has given up golf." -P.G. Wodehouse
"I played like s___." -Greg Norman after the Masters.
"Every rock'n'roll band I know, guys with long hair and tattoos, plays golf now." -Alice Cooper, 47.
"Golf tips are like aspirin. One may do you good, but if you swallow the whole bottle you will be lucky to survive." -Harvey Penick
"Nobody asked how you looked, just what you shot." -Sam Snead
"Happiness is a long walk with a putter." -Greg Norman
"You know what they say about big hitters...the woods are full of them." -Jimmy Demaret
"Golf is an easy game...It's just hard to play." -unknown
"Playing golf is just like going to a strip club. You're all revved up, ready to go. But three hours later, you're depressed, plastered, and most of your balls are missing." -James Clark
"..corr blimey O'Reilly" - Peter Alliss is astounded by a put or shot at the British Open
"The mind messes up more shots than the body." Tommy Bolt
"In Africa some of the native tribes have a custom of beating the ground with clubs and uttering spine chilling cries. Anthropologists call this a form of self expression. In America we call it golf."- Becker
"Golf is a sport in which the ball lies poorly but the player well" -Unknown
"They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. It's more complicated than that." -Gardner Dickinson
“Golf is like marbles for adults”- unknown
In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled “Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden”. . . and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.- Not a quote but a word origin from J.Brown..
"One of the reasons Arnie [Arnold Palmer] is playing so well is that, before each tee-shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them......Oh my God, what have I just said?"
(USTV Commentator)
"The greatest sound in golf is the Wosh, Wosh, Wosh, of your opponents club as he hurls it across the fairway" - unknown
To Golf or Not to Golf? What a silly question.
I was cut out to be a pro golfer…But someone stitched me up wrong.
If frustration and humiliation is your aim…then golf is your game
A golfer's diet…Live on "greens" as much as possible!!
Housework is for women who don’t know how to golf.
When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit.
"Gimme"…an uneasy agreement between two poor putters.
Gone golfin’…be back dark thirty.
If there’s no golf in heaven…I’m not going.
Fairways forever…Housework whenever!
I once gave up golf…It was the most terrifying week-end of my life.
I’m a two handicapper…my boss won’t let me off early, and my wife keeps me home week-ends!
I don’t say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they’ed come up sliced.
I’ve spent most of my life golfing…the rest I’ve just wasted.
The game is called golf…all the other 4-letter words were taken.
He who has the fastest cart has the best lie.
I’m hitting the woods just great…but having a terrible time getting out of them!
Born to golf…Forced to work.
Are we playing men’s rules today…or do we have to count each stroke.
I hate golf…I hate golf…"Nice shot"…I love golf!
Golf is my bag!!
My body is here, but my mind has already teed off.
May thy ball lie in green pastures…and not in still waters.
If I hit it right, it’s a slice…If I hit it left, it’s a hook…If I hit it straight, it’s a mirac
ILife is a game, golf is serious.
Early to Bed, early to rise, golf all day, make up lies
When the going gets tough, the tough go golfing
Keep Golf a beautiful sport, leave the pants in the closet.
Dirty Golf Sayings
1. barely walk
10. Nuts... my shaft is bent.
9. After 18 holes I can barely walk.
8. You really whacked the hell out of that sucker.
7. Look at the size of his putter.
6. Keep your head down and spread your legs a bit more.
5. Mind if I join your threesome?
4. Stand with your back turned and drop it.
3. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip.
2. Nice stroke, but your follow through has a lot to be desired.
And the number One thing that sounds dirty in golf but isn't:
1. Hold up... I need to wash my balls first.
Show me a man who is a good loser and I'll show you a man who is playing golf with his boss.
-- Jim Murray
Golf is a fascinating game. It has taken me nearly forty years to discover that I can't play it.
-- Ted Ray
My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying.
-- Ed Furgol
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.
-- Renee Hicks
It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course.
-- Hank Aaron
I had a wonderful experience on the golf course today. I had a hole in nothing. Missed the ball and sank the divot.
-- Don Adams
I have a tip that can take 5 strokes off anyone's golf game. It's called an eraser.
-- Arnold Palmer
I know I'm getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators.
-- Gerald R. Ford
The reason they call if 'golf' is that all the other 4 letter words were used up.
-- Leslie Nielsen
The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf - it's almost a law.
-- H. G. Wells (Bealby, 1915)
Eighteen holes of match or medal play will teach you more about your foe than will 18 years of dealing with him across a desk. ~Grantland Rice
Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five. ~John Updike
It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place this world is when one is playing golf. ~Robert Lynd
Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad. ~A.A. Milne
Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious. ~P.G. Wodehouse, A Mixed Threesome, 1922
I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game: it's called an eraser. ~Arnold Palmer
Golf is a game that is played on a five-inch course - the distance between your ears. ~Bobby Jones
I'm about five inches from being an outstanding golfer. That's the distance my left ear is from my right. ~Ben Crenshaw
Golf is like a love affair. If you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart. ~Arthur Daley
Golf is a fascinating game. It has taken me nearly forty years to discover that I can't play it. ~Ted Ray, Golf - My Slice of Life, 1972
The number of shots taken by an opponent who is out of sight is equal to the square root of the sum of the number of curses heard plus the number of swishes. ~Michael Green, The Art of Coarse Golf, 1975
If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out. ~Paul Gallico
Golf is like an 18-year-old girl with big boobs. You know it's wrong but you can't keep away from her. ~Val Doonican
Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic. ~Author Unknown
It's easy to see golf not as a game at all but as some whey-faced, nineteenth-century Presbyterian minister's fever dream of exorcism achieved through ritual and self-mortification. ~Bruce McCall
Forget your opponents; always play against par. ~Sam Snead
If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is. ~Horace G. Hutchinson
They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that. ~Gardner Dickinson
I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies. ~Will Rogers
If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death. ~Sam Snead
Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness. ~William Wordsworth
What other people may find in poetry or art museums, I find in the flight of a good drive. ~Arnold Palmer
The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing. ~Phyllis Diller
Fifty years ago, 100 white men chasing one black man across a field was called the Ku Klux Klan. Today it's called the PGA Tour. ~Author Unknown
A game in which you claim the privileges of age, and retain the playthings of childhood. ~Author Unknown, plagiarized from the Samuel Johnson quotation "It is a hopeless endeavour to unite the contrarieties of spring and winter; it is unjust to claim the priveleges of age, and retain the play-things of childhood." (Thank you, Frank Lynch.)
Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick. ~P.J. O'Rourke
The sport of choice for the urban poor is basketball. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is bowling. The sport of choice for front-line workers is football. The sport of choice for supervisors is baseball. The sport of choice for middle management is tennis. The sport of choice for corporate officers is golf. Conclusion: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become. ~Author Unknown
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. ~Dean Martin
Golf gives you an insight into human nature, your own as well as your opponent's. ~Grantland Rice
Golf is a good walk spoiled. ~Mark Twain
I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles. ~G.K. Chesterton
They throw their clubs backwards, and that's wrong. You should always throw a club ahead of you so that you don't have to walk any extra distance to get it. ~Tommy Bolt, about the tempers of modern players
If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business. ~Joey Adams
Man blames fate for other accidents but feels personally responsible for a hole in one. ~Martha Beckman
When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. ~Author Unknown
I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced. ~Attributed to both Miller Barber and Lee Trevino
Duffers who consistently shank their balls are urged to buy and study Shanks - No Thanks by R.K. Hoffman, or in extreme cases, M.S. Howard's excellent Tennis for Beginners. ~Henry Beard, Golfing, 1985
Golf is life. If you can't take golf, you can't take life. ~Author Unknown
In baseball you hit your home run over the right-field fence, the left-field fence, the center-field fence. Nobody cares. In golf everything has got to be right over second base. ~Ken Harrelson
If I can hit a curveball, why can't I hit a ball that is standing still on a course? ~Larry Nelson
Golf balls are attracted to water as unerringly as the eye of a middle-aged man to a female bosom. ~Michael Green, The Art of Coarse Golf, 1967
If your opponent is playing several shots in vain attempts to extricate himself from a bunker, do not stand near him and audibly count his strokes. It would be justifiable homicide if he wound up his pitiable exhibition by applying his niblick to your head. ~Harry Vardon
Real golfers, no matter what the provocation, never strike a caddie with the driver. The sand wedge is far more effective. ~Huxtable Pippey
A passion, an obsession, a romance, a nice acquaintanceship with trees, sand, and water. ~Bob Ryan
Drugs are very much a part of professional sports today, but when you think about it, golf is the only sport where the players aren't penalized for being on grass. ~Bob Hope
Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn't a lot of strokes when you consider the course. ~Lee Trevino
I've spent most of my life golfing... the rest I've just wasted. ~Author Unknown
They call it golf because all of the other four-letter words were taken. ~Raymond Floyd
My handicap? Woods and irons. ~Chris Codiroli
The golf swing is like a suitcase into which we are trying to pack one too many things. ~John Updike
Even God has to practice his putting. ~Golf Saying
Actually, the only time I ever took out a one-iron was to kill a tarantula. And it took a seven to do that. ~Jim Murray
The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody put a flagstick on top. ~Pete Dye
I'd play every day if I could. It's cheaper than a shrink and there are no telephones on my golf cart. ~Brent Musburger
If you're caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron. ~Lee Trevino
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun. ~Jim Bishop
I'm hitting the woods just great, but I'm having a terrible time getting out of them. ~Harry Toscano
I know I am getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators. ~Gerald Ford
"Play it as it lies" is one of the fundamental dictates of golf. The other is "Wear it if it clashes." ~Henry Beard, Golfing, 1985
I just hope I don't have to explain all the times I've used His name in vain when I get up there. ~Bob Hope, about his golfing
I can airmail the golf ball, but sometimes I don't put the right address on it. ~Jim Dent
It is more satisfying to be a bad player at golf. The worse you play, the better you remember the occasional good shot. ~Nubar Gulbenkian, 1972
Some of us worship in churches, some in synagogues, some on golf courses. ~Adlai Stevenson
I would like to deny all allegations by Bob Hope that during my last game of golf, I hit an eagle, a birdie, an elk and a moose. ~Gerald Ford
The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off. I shot the happiest 83 of my life. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez
A golf course is nothing but a poolroom moved outdoors. ~Barry Fitzgerald, Going My Way
I'll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105. ~Bob Hope
After all these years, it's still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez, on his Puerto Rican accent
My swing is so bad I look like a caveman killing his lunch. ~Lee Trevino
Playing the game I have learned the meaning of humility. It has given me an understanding of futility of the human effort. ~Abba Eban
It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. ~Hank Aaron, 1971
Swinging at daisies is like playing electric guitar with a tennis racket: if it were that easy, we could all be Jerry Garcia. The ball changes everything. ~Michael Bamberger
One of the most fascinating things about golf is how it reflects the cycle of life. No matter what you shoot - the next day you have to go back to the first tee and begin all over again and make yourself into something. ~Peter Jacobsen
You are meant to play the ball as it lies, a fact that may help to touch on your own objective approach to life. ~Grantland Rice
A golf ball is like a clock. Always hit it at 6 o'clock and make it go toward 12 o'clock. But make sure you're in the same time zone. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez
Golf isn't like other sports where you can take a player out if he's having a bad day. You have to play the whole game. ~Phil Blackmar
The trouble that most of us find with the modern matched sets of clubs is that they don't really seem to know any more about the game than the old ones did. ~Robert Browning, A History of Golf
Golf is the cruelest game, because eventually it will drag you out in front of the whole school, take your lunch money and slap you around. ~Rick Reilly, "Master Strokes," Sports Illustrated
Golf is the cruelest of sports. Like life, it's unfair. It's a harlot. A trollop. It leads you on. It never lives up to its promises.... It's a boulevard of broken dreams. It plays with men. And runs off with the butcher. ~Jim Murray
Golf is essentially an exercise in masochism conducted out-of-doors. ~Paul O'Neil
Golf is an open exhibition of overweening ambition, courage deflated by stupidity, skill scoured by a whiff of arrogance. ~Alistair Cooke
No game designed to be played with the aid of personal servants by right-handed men who can't even bring along their dogs can be entirely good for the soul. ~Bruce McCall, "The Case Against Golf," Esquire
These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow. ~Sam Snead
Through years of experience I have found that air offers less resistance than dirt. ~Jack Nicklaus, on why he tees his ball high.
Golf is not a game, it's bondage. It was obviously devised by a man torn with guilt, eager to atone for his sins. ~Jim Murray
Golf is an awkward set of bodily contortions designed to produce a graceful result. ~Tommy Armour
Who watches golf on TV? Who calls eight friends over and gets a keg of beer? Landscapers, I guess. They sit around the TV, yelling, "Will you look at that golf path? Pure pea gravel." ~Jeff Cesario
But you don't have to go up in the stands and play your foul balls. I do. ~Sam Snead, to Ted Williams, arguing which was more difficult, to hit a moving baseball or a stationary golf ball
A hole in one is amazing when you think of the different universes this white mass of molecules has to pass through on its way to the hole. ~Mac O'Grady
Trevino is in a league by himself. We don't even count him. We figure when you come in second, you're a winner. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez
Golf is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six, and write down five. ~Paul Harvey
In golf, you keep your head down and follow through. In the vice presidency, you keep your head up and follow through. It's a big difference. ~Dan Quayle
You can't call it a sport. You don't run, jump, you don't shoot, you don't pass. All you have to do is buy some clothes that don't match. ~Steve Sax
The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil. ~Author Unknown
One under a tree, one under a bush, one under the water. ~Lee Trevino, describing how he was one under during a tournament
The average golfer doesn't play golf. He attacks it. ~Jack Burke
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. ~Tiger Woods
The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of butterflies in the adjoining meadows. ~P.G. Wodehouse
It's so bad I could putt off a tabletop and still leave the ball halfway down the leg. ~J.C. Snead, on his putting
Any game where a man 60 can beat a man 30 ain't no game. ~Burt Shotten
There are two things you can do with your head down - play golf and pray. ~Lee Trevino
Golf is not just an exercise; it's an adventure, a romance... a Shakespeare play in which disaster and comedy are intertwined. ~Harold Segall
The worst club in my bag is my brain. ~Chris Perry
Golf is a game where white men can dress up as black pimps and get away with it. ~Robin Williams, 1986
Golf is hockey at the halt. ~Arthur Marshall, 1985
There is one thing in this world that is dumber than playing golf. That is watching someone else playing golf. What do you actually get to see? Thirty-seven guys in polyester slacks squinting at the sun. Doesn't that set your blood racing? ~Peter Andrews
The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law. ~H.G. Wells, Bealby, 1915
[Golf] is like chasing a quinine pill around a cow pasture. ~Winston Churchill
The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. ~Ernest Hemingway
One of the advantages bowling has over golf is that you seldom lose a bowling ball. ~Don Carter
I'm a golfaholic, no question about that. Counseling wouldn't help me. They'd have to put me in prison, and then I'd talk the warden into building a hole or two and teach him how to play. ~Lee Trevino
A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers, neither of whom can putt very well. ~Author Unknown
Give me the fresh air, a beautiful partner, and a nice round of golf, and you can keep the fresh air and the round of golf. ~Jack Benny
Golf is a game in which the ball lies poorly and the players well. ~Art Rosenbaum
Art said he wanted to get more distance. I told him to hit it and run backward. ~Ken Venturi, on Art Rosenbaum
One thing about golf is you don't know why you play bad and why you play good. ~George Archer
Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards? ~Al Boliska
If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, let him. ~Bob Hope
Golf is the most fun you can have without taking your clothes off. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez
"After all, golf is only a game," said Millicent. Women say these things without thinking. It does not mean that there is a kink in their character. They simply don't realise what they are saying. ~P.G. Wodehouse, Order by Golf, 1922
When I putt, my emotions collide like tectonic plates. It's left my memory circuits full of scars that won't heal. ~Mac O'Grady
The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. ~Billy Graham
That son of a bitch was able to hole a putt over 60 feet of peanut brittle. ~Lloyd Mangrum, about Bobby Locke
Golf is not, on the whole, a game for realists. By its exactitudes of measurements it invites the attention of perfectionists. ~Heywood Hale Broun
Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun? ~Bob Hope
His driving is unbelievable. I don't go that far on my holidays. ~Ian Baker-Finch, on John Daly
John certainly gives it a good hit, doesn't he? My Sunday best is a Wednesday afternoon compared to him. ~Nick Faldo, on John Daly
I never pray to God to make a putt. I pray to God to help me react good if I miss a putt. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez
Golf seems to me an arduous way to go for a walk. I prefer to take the dogs out. ~Princess Anne of Great Britain
One minute you're bleeding. The next minute you're hemorrhaging. The next minute you're painting the Mona Lisa. ~Mac O'Grady, describing a typical round of golf
If you wish to hide your character, do not play golf. ~Percey Boomer
Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing. ~Ben Hogan
Yeah, after each of my downhill putts. ~Homero Blancas, asked if he had any uphill putts
When you hear someone shout "You da man," if he ain't shouting at Arnold Palmer, then it ain't da man. ~Ron Green, Charlotte Observer
Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle. ~Author Unknown
What's nice about our tour is you can't remember your bad shots. ~Bob Bruce, about the senior tour
Golf is golf. You hit the ball, you go find it. Then you hit it again. ~Lon Hinkle
To some golfers, the greatest handicap is the ability to add correctly. ~Author Unknown
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. ~Jack Lemmon
I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play. ~Joe E. Lewis
The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. ~Will Rogers
I don't like watching golf on TV. I can't stand whispering. ~David Brenner
One almost expects one of the players to peer into the monitor and politely request viewers to refrain from munching so loudly on cheese and crackers while the golfers are trying to reach the greens. ~Pete Alfano
Golf without mistakes is like watching haircuts. A dinner without wine. ~Jim Murray
Men who would face torture without a word become blasphemous at the short fourteenth. It is clear that the game of golf may well be included in that category of intolerable provocations which may legally excuse or mitigate behaviour not otherwise excusable. ~A.P. Herbert, Misleading Cases, 1935
If I had my way, any man guilty of golf would be barred from any public office in the United States and the families of the breed would be shipped off to the white slave corrals of Argentina. ~H.L. Mencken
All I've got against it is that it takes you so far from the clubhouse. ~Eric Linklater, Poet's Pub, 1929
Baseball players quit playing and they take up golf. Basketball players quit, take up golf. Football players quit, take up golf. What are we supposed to take up when we quit? ~George Archer
A golf course outside a big town serves an excellent purpose in that it segregates, as though a concentration camp, all the idle and idiot well-to-do. ~Osbert Sitwell
If you want to take long walks, take long walks. If you want to hit things with sticks, hit things with sticks. But there's no excuse for combining the two and putting the results on TV. Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns. ~National Lampoon, 1979
It's good sportsmanship not to pick up lost balls while they are still rolling. ~Mark Twain
Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty. ~Harry Vardon
Golf is an ineffectual attempt to put an elusive ball into an obscure hole with implements ill-adapted to the purpose. ~Woodrow Wilson
A golfer's diet: live on greens as much as possible. ~Author Unknown
Gone golfin'... be back dark thirty. ~Author Unknown
Born to golf. Forced to work. ~Author Unknown
My body is here, but my mind has already teed off. ~Author Unknown
Find a man with both feet firmly on the ground and you've found a man about to make a difficult putt. ~Fletcher Knebel
Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them. ~Jimmy DeMaret
May thy ball lie in green pastures... and not in still waters. ~Author Unknown
If I hit it right, it's a slice. If I hit it left, it's a hook. If I hit it straight, it's a miracle. ~Author Unknown
If you call on God to improve the results of a shot while it is still in motion, you are using "an outside agency" and subject to appropriate penalties under the rules of golf. ~Henry Longhurst
The difference between golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. ~George Deukmejian
.The only hole in one I got was in my socks.
To get more distance out of your drives, hit the ball and run backwards!
I've always made a total effort, even when the odds seemed entirely against me. I never quit trying; I never felt that I didn't have a chance to win." -Arnold Palmer
"Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more about your foe than nineteen years of dealing with him across the desk." -Grantland Rice
"The fundamental problem with golf is that every so often, no matter how lacking you may be in the essential virtues required of a steady player, the odds are that one day you will hit the ball straight, hard, and out of sight. This is the essential frustration of this excruciating sport. For when you've done it once, you make the fundamental error of asking yourself why you can't do this all the time. The answer to this question is simple: the first time was a fluke." -Colin Bowles
"Talking to a golf ball won't do you any good. Unless you do it while your opponent is teeing off." -Bruce Lansky
"If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball." -Jack Lemmon
"When I'm on a golf course and it starts to rain and lightning, I hold up my one iron, 'caus I know even God can't hit a one iron." -Lee Trevino
"I'll always remember the day I broke ninety. I had a few beers in the clubhouse and was so excited I forgot to play the back nine." -Bruce Lansky
"As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round." -Ben Hogan
"My best score ever was 103, but I've only been playing 15 years." -Alex Karris
"Golf is the hardest game in the world to play, and the easiest to cheat at." -Dave Hill
"Never bet with anyone you meet on the first tee, who has a deep suntan, a one iron in his bag and squinty eyes." -Dave Marr
"The golf swing is like sex. You can't be thinking about the mechanics of the act while you are performing." -Dave Hill
"Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into a even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose." -Winston Churchill
"Relax? How can anybody relax and play golf? You have to grip the club don't you?" -Ben Hogan
"You don't know what pressure is until you've played for five dollars a hole with only two in your pocket."-Lee Trevino
"Golf is a game in which you yell 'fore', shoot six and write down five." -Paul Harvey
"A lot of guys who have have never choked, have never been in the position to do so." -Tom Watson
"I'm hitting the woods just great, but I'm having a terrible time getting out of them" -Harry Tofcano
"Golf is a game where guts and blind devotion will always net you absolutely nothing but an ulcer." -Tommy Bolt
"Golf is based on honesty, where else would you admit to a seven on a par three?" -Jimmy Demaret
"It's nice to have the opportunity to play for so much money, but it's nicer to win it." -Patty Sheenan
"I play with friends, but we don't play friendly games." -Ben Hogan
"Golf is an ideal diversion, but a ruinous disease." -Bertie Forbes
"Putts get real difficult the day they hand out the money." -Lee Trevino
"There are no points for style when it comes to putting. It's getting the ball in the cup that counts." -Brian Swarbrick
"Golf is twenty percent mechanics and technique. The other eighty percent is philosophy, humor, tragedy, romance, melodrama, companionship, camaraderie, cussedness, and conversation." -Grantland Rice
"The harder you work, the luckier you get." -Gary Player "Victory is everything. You can spend the money, but you can never spend the memories." -Ken Venturi
"Golf is 90 percent inspiration and 10 percent perspiration." -Johnny Miller
"The number one thing about trouble is...don't get into more." -Dave Stockton
"It's the most fun I've had with my clothes on." -Lee Trevino
"Mulligan: invented by an Irishman who wanted to hit one more twenty yard grounder." -Jim Bishop
"If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf." -Bob Hope
"The only shots you can be sure of are those you've had already." -Byron Nelson
"Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at it." -Jimmy Demaret
"Most golfers prepare for disaster. A good golfer prepares for success." -Bob Toski
"You've just one problem. You stand too close to the ball after you've hit it." -Sam Snead
"The fun you get from golf is in direct ratio to the effort you don't put into it." -Bob Allen
"Golf is good walk spoiled." -Mark Twain
"We have fifty-one golf courses in Palm Springs. He(Gerald Ford) never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot...At least he can't cheat on his score- because all you have to do is look back down the fairway and count the wounded." -Bob Hope
"You can't lose an old golf ball." -John Willis
"Indeed, the highest pleasure of golf may be that on the fairways and far from all the pressures of commerce and rationality, we can feel immortal for a few hours." -Colman McCarthy
"My game is so bad I gotta hire three caddies- one to walk the left rough, one for the right, and one for the middle. And the one in the middle doesn't have much to do." -Dave Hill
"When he gets the ball into a tough place, that's when he's most relaxed. I think it's because he has so much experience at it." -Don Christopher(Jack Lemmon's Caddie)
"A professional will tell you the amount of flex you need in the shaft of your club. The more the flex, the more strength you will need to break the thing over your knees." -Stephen Baker
"There are three ways of learning golf: by study, which is the most wearisome; by imitation, which is the most fallacious; and by experience, which is the most bitter." -Robert Browning
"Why am I using a new putter? Because the last one didn't float too well." -Craig Stadler
"Obviously a deer on the fairway has seen you tee off before and knows that the safest place to be when you play is right down the middle." -Jackie Gleason
"I'd like to see the fairways more narrow. Then everybody would have to play from the rough, not just me." -Seve Ballesteros
"We speak of eyeball-to-eyeball encounters between men great and small. Even more reaching and revealing of character is the eyeball-to-golfball confrontation, whereby our most secret natures are mercilessly tested by a small, round, whitish object with no mind or will but with a very definite life of its own, and with whims perverse and beatific." -John Stewart Martin
"Be funny on a golf course? Do I kid my best friend's mother about her heart condition?" -Phil Silvers
"The reason the golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing." -Phyllis Diller
"I'd give up golf if I didn't have so many sweaters." -Bob Hope
"The person I fear most in the last two rounds is myself." -Tom Watson
" Everybody has two swings-a beautiful practice swing and the choked-up one with with which they hit the ball. So it wouldn't do either of us a damned bit of good to look at your practice swing." -Ed Furgol
"If your caddie coaches you on the tee, 'Hit it down the left side with a little draw,' ignore him. All you do on the tee is try not to hit the caddie." -Jim Murray
"Always throw your clubs ahead of you. That way you don't have to waste energy going back to pick them up." -Tommy Bolt
"Always keep in mind that if God didn't want a man to have mulligans, golf balls wouldn't come three to a sleeve." -Dan Jenkins
"I know I'm getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators." -Gerald Ford
"Competitive golf is played mainly on a five-and-a-half-inch course, the space between your ears." -Bobby Jones
"Actually, the only time I ever took out a one iron was to kill a tarantula. And I took a seven to do that." -Jim Murry
"The right way to play golf is to go up and hit the bloody thing." -George Duncan
"If you pick up a golfer and hold it close to your ear, like a conch shell, and listen- you will hear an alibi." -Fred Beck
"He enjoys that perfect peace, that peace beyond all understanding, which comes at its maximum only to the man who has given up golf." -P.G. Wodehouse
"I played like s___." -Greg Norman after the Masters.
"Every rock'n'roll band I know, guys with long hair and tattoos, plays golf now." -Alice Cooper, 47.
"Golf tips are like aspirin. One may do you good, but if you swallow the whole bottle you will be lucky to survive." -Harvey Penick
"Nobody asked how you looked, just what you shot." -Sam Snead (Tnx..JP)
"Happiness is a long walk with a putter." -Greg Norman (Tnx..JoeT)
"You know what they say about big hitters...the woods are full of them." -Jimmy Demaret (Tnx..TZ)
"Golf is an easy game...It's just hard to play." -unknown (Tnx..KK) "Playing golf is just like going to a strip club. You're all revved up, ready to go. But three hours later, you're depressed, plastered, and most of your balls are missing." -James Clark (tnx..LC)
"..corr blimey O'Reilly" - Peter Alliss is astounded by a put or shot at the British Open (Tnx..CM)
"The mind messes up more shots than the body." Tommy Bolt (Tnx..AC)
"In Africa some of the native tribes have a custom of beating the ground with clubs and uttering spine chilling cries. Anthropologists call this a form of self expression. In America we call it golf."- Becker (Tnx..bs, who's becker?)
"Golf is a sport in which the ball lies poorly but the player well" -Unknown (Tnx..clv)
"They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. It's more complicated than that." -Gardner Dickinson (ditto)
“Golf is like marbles for adults”- unknown (Thanks..EMcC)
In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled “Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden”. . . and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.- Not a quote but a word origin from J.Brown..tnx
GOLF SAYINGS
1. Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by
the occasional miracle.
2. "I wish I could play my normal game...just once."
3. "Golf is harder than baseball. In golf, you have to play your foul
balls."
4. If you find you do not mind playing golf in the rain, the snow, even
during a hurricane, here's a valuable tip: your life is in trouble.
5. Golfers who try to make everything perfect before taking the shot
rarely make a perfect shot.
6. The term "mulligan" is really a contraction of the phrase "maul it
again."
7. A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two
golfers...neither of whom can putt very well.
8. An interesting thing about golf is that no matter how badly you play;
it is always possible to get worse.
9. Golf's a hard game to figure. One day you'll go out and slice it and
shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you
go out and for no reason at all you really stink.
10. I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.
11. If your best shots are the practice swing and the "gimme Putt", you
might wish to reconsider this game.
12. Achieving a certain level of success in golf is only important if you
can finally enjoy the level you've reached after you've reached it.
13. Golf is the only sport where the most feared opponent is you.
14. Golf is like marriage: If you take yourself too seriously it won't
work... and both are expensive.
15. The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil.
16. To some golfers, the greatest handicap is the ability to add
correctly.
17. In golf, some people tend to get confused with all the numbers...
they shoot a "six," yell "fore" and write "five".
18. Swing easy. Hit hard.
19. If you find yourself pleased that you locate more balls in the rough
than you actually have lost, your focus is totally wrong and your
personality might not be right for golf...it is also just a matter of
time before the IRS investigates your business.
20. Why is it twice as difficult to hit a ball over water than sand?
21. Golf! You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the
ball goes right. The lowest score wins. And on top of that, the winner
buys the drinks.
Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more about your foe than 18 years of dealing with him across a desk. ~Grantland Rice
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. ~ George Deukmejian
Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe. ~ Author Unknown
Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five. ~John Updike
It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. ~Robert Lynd
If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is. ~Horace G. Hutchinson
They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that.
~Gardner Dickinson
If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death. ~Sam Snead
Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness. ~William Wordsworth
Golf is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six, and write down five. ~ Paul Harvey
Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. ~Jack Benny
Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards? ~ Al Boliska
Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing.~ Ben Hogan
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. ~ Jack Lemmon
It is good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. ~ Mark Twain
Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose. ~ Woodrow Wilson
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. ~Dean Martin
If you are going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don't have to waste energy going back to pick it up. ~Tommy Bolt
Man blames fate for other accidents, but feels personally responsible when he makes a hole in one. ~Author Unknown
I don't say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they'd come up sliced.
~Author Unknown
I have spent most of my life golfing ..... the rest I have just wasted. ~ Author Unknown
The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag stick on top. ~ Pete Dye
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun. ~ Jim Bishop
I am hitting the woods just great ..... but having a terrible time getting out of them! ~ Author Unknown
I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators. ~ Gerald Ford
My handicap? Woods and irons. ~Chris Codiroli
The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag stick on top.
~Pete Dye
I'm hitting the woods just great ....but having a terrible time getting out of them!
~Author Unknown
The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. ~Billy Graham
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
~Jack Lemmon
It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
~Mark Twain
Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty. ~Harry Vardon
Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them.
~Jimmy DeMaret
May thy ball lie in green pastures .... and not in still waters. ~Author Unknown
If I hit it right, it's a slice. If I hit it left, it's a hook. If I hit it straight, it's a miracle.
~Author Unknown
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie.
~George Deukmejian
Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe.
~Author Unknowns
That looks like very good exercise,
but what is the little white ball for?
"Fore" ever golfing
If it goes right, it's a slice,
if it goes left, it's a hook,
if it goes straight, it's a MIRACLE!
The uglier a man's legs are,
the better he plays golf.
It's almost a law.
We speak of eyeball-to-eyeball encounters
between men great and small. Even more
reaching and revealing of character is
the eyeball-to-golfball confrontation,
whereby our most secret natures are
mercilessly tested by a small, round,
whitish object with no mind or will but
with a very definite life of its own,
and with whims perverse and beatific.
Indeed, the highest pleasure of golf may
be that on the fairways and far from all
the pressures of commerce and rationality,
we can feel immortal for a few hours.
A bad day of golf is better than a good day at work.
Eat...sleep...golf.
Go play golf.
Go to the golf course.
Hit the ball.
Find the ball.
Repeat until the ball is in the hole.
Have fun.
The end.
It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits in
baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf
course.
OF COURSE everyone is GREEN at one time or another but the HOLE idea is to feel the DRIVE and not just PUTTER around. WOOD you rather have a CHIP on your shoulder or fly on the EAGLE's wings? Don't just CART around your BAG of BELOW PAR scores, FORE you are bound for SAND TRAPS. Join the CLUB. Have a BALL, and seek IRONY in life. The early BIRDie gets the worm. Don't get TEEd off! Just remember what BOGEY Beara might've said, "Put the heart before the GOLF COURSE." -Gina Marie Lauchner
Golf is 90 percent inspiration
and 10 percent perspiration
Golf is a game in which you yell FORE, shoot six, and write down five.
Golf is deceptively simple and endlessly complicated. It satisfies the soul and frustrates the intellect. It is at the same time rewarding and maddening-it is without a doubt the greatest game mankind has ever invented. Arnold Palmer
Golf is twenty percent mechanics and technique.
The other eighty percent is philosophy, humor,
tragedy, romance, melodrama, companionship,
camaraderie, cussedness, and conversation
Golf is an ineffectual attempt to direct an uncontrollable sphere into an inaccessible hole with instruments ill-adapted to the purpose.
--Winston Churchill
SAYINGS
1. Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle.
2. "I wish I could play my normal game...just once."
3. "Golf is harder than baseball. In golf, you have to play your foul balls."
4. If you find you do not mind playing golf in the rain, the snow, even during a hurricane, here's a valuable tip: your life is in trouble.
5. Golfers who try to make everything perfect before taking the shot rarely make a perfect shot.
6. The term "mulligan" is really a contraction of the phrase "maul it again."
7. A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers...neither of whom can putt very well.
8. An interesting thing about golf is that no matter how badly you play; it is always possible to get worse.
9. Golf's a hard game to figure. One day you'll go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you
go out and for no reason at all you really stink.
10. I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.
11. If your best shots are the practice swing and the "gimme Putt", you might wish to reconsider this game.
12. Achieving a certain level of success in golf is only important if you can finally enjoy the level you've reached after you've reached it.
13. Golf is the only sport where the most feared opponent is you.
14. Golf is like marriage: If you take yourself too seriously it won't work... and both are expensive.
15. The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil.
16. To some golfers, the greatest handicap is the ability to add correctly.
17. In golf, some people tend to get confused with all the numbers...they shoot a "six," yell "fore" and write "five".
18. Swing easy. Hit hard.
19. If you find yourself pleased that you locate more balls in the rough than you actually have lost, your focus is totally wrong and your
personality might not be right for golf...it is also just a matter of time before the IRS investigates your business.
20. Why is it twice as difficult to hit a ball over water than sand?
21. Golf! You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the ball goes right. The lowest score wins. And on top of that, the winner
buys the drinks.
Happiness is a long walk with a putter.
"I've always made a total effort, even when the odds seemed entirely against me. I never quit trying; I never felt that I didn't have a chance to win." -Arnold Palmer
Golf: "A game in which you claim the privileges of age, and retain the playthings of childhood." -Samuel Johnson
"Golf is like a love affair: If you don't take it seriously, it's not fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart." -Arnold Daly
"No matter what happens- never give up a hole...In tossing in your cards after a bad beginning you also undermine your whole game, because to quit between tee and green is more habit-forming than drinking a highball before breakfast." -Sam Snead
"Golf does strange things to other people, too. It makes liars out of honest men, cheats out of altruists, cowards out of brave men and fools out of everybody." -Milton Gross
"Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more about your foe than nineteen years of dealing with him across the desk." -Grantland Rice
"The fundamental problem with golf is that every so often, no matter how lacking you may be in the essential virtues required of a steady player, the odds are that one day you will hit the ball straight, hard, and out of sight. This is the essential frustration of this excruciating sport. For when you've done it once, you make the fundamental error of asking yourself why you can't do this all the time. The answer to this question is simple: the first time was a fluke." -Colin Bowles
"Talking to a golf ball won't do you any good. Unless you do it while your opponent is teeing off." -Bruce Lansky
"It's still good sportsmanship to not pick up lost balls while they are still rolling." -Mark Twain
"The older you get the stronger the wind gets- and it's always in your face." -Jack Nicklaus
"If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball." -Jack Lemmon
"When I'm on a golf course and it starts to rain and lightning, I hold up my one iron, 'caus I know even God can't hit a one iron." -Lee Trevino
"I'll always remember the day I broke ninety. I had a few beers in the clubhouse and was so excited I forgot to play the back nine." -Bruce Lansky
"As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round." -Ben Hogan
"My best score ever was 103, but I've only been playing 15 years." -Alex Karris
"Golf is the hardest game in the world to play, and the easiest to cheat at." -Dave Hill
"Never bet with anyone you meet on the first tee, who has a deep suntan, a one iron in his bag and squinty eyes." -Dave Marr
"The golf swing is like sex. You can't be thinking about the mechanics of the act while you are performing." -Dave Hill
"Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into a even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose." -Winston Churchill
"Relax? How can anybody relax and play golf? You have to grip the club don't you?" -Ben Hogan
"You don't know what pressure is until you've played for five dollars a hole with only two in your pocket."-Lee Trevino
"Golf is a game in which you yell 'fore', shoot six and write down five." -Paul Harvey
"A lot of guys who have have never choked, have never been in the position to do so." -Tom Watson
"I'm hitting the woods just great, but I'm having a terrible time getting out of them" -Harry Tofcano
"Golf is a game where guts and blind devotion will always net you absolutely nothing but an ulcer." -Tommy Bolt
"Golf is based on honesty, where else would you admit to a seven on a par three?" -Jimmy Demaret
"It's nice to have the opportunity to play for so much money, but it's nicer to win it." -Patty Sheenan
"I play with friends, but we don't play friendly games." -Ben Hogan
"Golf is an ideal diversion, but a ruinous disease." -Bertie Forbes
"Putts get real difficult the day they hand out the money." -Lee Trevino
"There are no points for style when it comes to putting. It's getting the ball in the cup that counts." -Brian Swarbrick
"Golf is twenty percent mechanics and technique. The other eighty percent is philosophy, humor, tragedy, romance, melodrama, companionship, camaraderie, cussedness, and conversation." -Grantland Rice
"The harder you work, the luckier you get." -Gary Player "Victory is everything. You can spend the money, but you can never spend the memories." -Ken Venturi
"Golf is 90 percent inspiration and 10 percent perspiration." -Johnny Miller
"The number one thing about trouble is...don't get into more." -Dave Stockton
"It's the most fun I've had with my clothes on." -Lee Trevino
"Mulligan: invented by an Irishman who wanted to hit one more twenty yard grounder." -Jim Bishop
"If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf." -Bob Hope
"The only shots you can be sure of are those you've had already." -Byron Nelson
"Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at it." -Jimmy Demaret
"Most golfers prepare for disaster. A good golfer prepares for success." -Bob Toski
"You've just one problem. You stand too close to the ball after you've hit it." -Sam Snead
"The fun you get from golf is in direct ratio to the effort you don't put into it." -Bob Allen
"Golf is good walk spoiled." -Mark Twain
"We have fifty-one golf courses in Palm Springs. He(Gerald Ford) never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot...At least he can't cheat on his score- because all you have to do is look back down the fairway and count the wounded." -Bob Hope
"You can't lose an old golf ball." -John Willis
"Indeed, the highest pleasure of golf may be that on the fairways and far from all the pressures of commerce and rationality, we can feel immortal for a few hours." -Colman McCarthy
"My game is so bad I gotta hire three caddies- one to walk the left rough, one for the right, and one for the middle. And the one in the middle doesn't have much to do." -Dave Hill
"When he gets the ball into a tough place, that's when he's most relaxed. I think it's because he has so much experience at it." -Don Christopher(Jack Lemmon's Caddie)
"A professional will tell you the amount of flex you need in the shaft of your club. The more the flex, the more strength you will need to break the thing over your knees." -Stephen Baker
"There are three ways of learning golf: by study, which is the most wearisome; by imitation, which is the most fallacious; and by experience, which is the most bitter." -Robert Browning
"Why am I using a new putter? Because the last one didn't float too well." -Craig Stadler
"Obviously a deer on the fairway has seen you tee off before and knows that the safest place to be when you play is right down the middle." -Jackie Gleason
"I'd like to see the fairways more narrow. Then everybody would have to play from the rough, not just me." -Seve Ballesteros
"We speak of eyeball-to-eyeball encounters between men great and small. Even more reaching and revealing of character is the eyeball-to-golfball confrontation, whereby our most secret natures are mercilessly tested by a small, round, whitish object with no mind or will but with a very definite life of its own, and with whims perverse and beatific." -John Stewart Martin
"Be funny on a golf course? Do I kid my best friend's mother about her heart condition?" -Phil Silvers
"The reason the golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing." -Phyllis Diller
"I'd give up golf if I didn't have so many sweaters." -Bob Hope
"The person I fear most in the last two rounds is myself." -Tom Watson
" Everybody has two swings-a beautiful practice swing and the choked-up one with with which they hit the ball. So it wouldn't do either of us a damned bit of good to look at your practice swing." -Ed Furgol
"If your caddie coaches you on the tee, 'Hit it down the left side with a little draw,' ignore him. All you do on the tee is try not to hit the caddie." -Jim Murray
"Always throw your clubs ahead of you. That way you don't have to waste energy going back to pick them up." -Tommy Bolt
"Always keep in mind that if God didn't want a man to have mulligans, golf balls wouldn't come three to a sleeve." -Dan Jenkins
"I know I'm getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators." -Gerald Ford
"Competitive golf is played mainly on a five-and-a-half-inch course, the space between your ears." -Bobby Jones
"Actually, the only time I ever took out a one iron was to kill a tarantula. And I took a seven to do that." -Jim Murry
"The right way to play golf is to go up and hit the bloody thing." -George Duncan
"If you pick up a golfer and hold it close to your ear, like a conch shell, and listen- you will hear an alibi." -Fred Beck
"He enjoys that perfect peace, that peace beyond all understanding, which comes at its maximum only to the man who has given up golf." -P.G. Wodehouse
"I played like s___." -Greg Norman after the Masters.
"Every rock'n'roll band I know, guys with long hair and tattoos, plays golf now." -Alice Cooper, 47.
"Golf tips are like aspirin. One may do you good, but if you swallow the whole bottle you will be lucky to survive." -Harvey Penick
"Nobody asked how you looked, just what you shot." -Sam Snead
"Happiness is a long walk with a putter." -Greg Norman
"You know what they say about big hitters...the woods are full of them." -Jimmy Demaret
"Golf is an easy game...It's just hard to play." -unknown
"Playing golf is just like going to a strip club. You're all revved up, ready to go. But three hours later, you're depressed, plastered, and most of your balls are missing." -James Clark
"..corr blimey O'Reilly" - Peter Alliss is astounded by a put or shot at the British Open
"The mind messes up more shots than the body." Tommy Bolt
"In Africa some of the native tribes have a custom of beating the ground with clubs and uttering spine chilling cries. Anthropologists call this a form of self expression. In America we call it golf."- Becker
"Golf is a sport in which the ball lies poorly but the player well" -Unknown
"They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. It's more complicated than that." -Gardner Dickinson
“Golf is like marbles for adults”- unknown
In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled “Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden”. . . and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.- Not a quote but a word origin from J.Brown..
"One of the reasons Arnie [Arnold Palmer] is playing so well is that, before each tee-shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them......Oh my God, what have I just said?"
(USTV Commentator)
"The greatest sound in golf is the Wosh, Wosh, Wosh, of your opponents club as he hurls it across the fairway" - unknown
To Golf or Not to Golf? What a silly question.
I was cut out to be a pro golfer…But someone stitched me up wrong.
If frustration and humiliation is your aim…then golf is your game
A golfer's diet…Live on "greens" as much as possible!!
Housework is for women who don’t know how to golf.
When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit.
"Gimme"…an uneasy agreement between two poor putters.
Gone golfin’…be back dark thirty.
If there’s no golf in heaven…I’m not going.
Fairways forever…Housework whenever!
I once gave up golf…It was the most terrifying week-end of my life.
I’m a two handicapper…my boss won’t let me off early, and my wife keeps me home week-ends!
I don’t say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they’ed come up sliced.
I’ve spent most of my life golfing…the rest I’ve just wasted.
The game is called golf…all the other 4-letter words were taken.
He who has the fastest cart has the best lie.
I’m hitting the woods just great…but having a terrible time getting out of them!
Born to golf…Forced to work.
Are we playing men’s rules today…or do we have to count each stroke.
I hate golf…I hate golf…"Nice shot"…I love golf!
Golf is my bag!!
My body is here, but my mind has already teed off.
May thy ball lie in green pastures…and not in still waters.
If I hit it right, it’s a slice…If I hit it left, it’s a hook…If I hit it straight, it’s a mirac
ILife is a game, golf is serious.
Early to Bed, early to rise, golf all day, make up lies
When the going gets tough, the tough go golfing
Keep Golf a beautiful sport, leave the pants in the closet.
Dirty Golf Sayings
1. barely walk
10. Nuts... my shaft is bent.
9. After 18 holes I can barely walk.
8. You really whacked the hell out of that sucker.
7. Look at the size of his putter.
6. Keep your head down and spread your legs a bit more.
5. Mind if I join your threesome?
4. Stand with your back turned and drop it.
3. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip.
2. Nice stroke, but your follow through has a lot to be desired.
And the number One thing that sounds dirty in golf but isn't:
1. Hold up... I need to wash my balls first.
Show me a man who is a good loser and I'll show you a man who is playing golf with his boss.
-- Jim Murray
Golf is a fascinating game. It has taken me nearly forty years to discover that I can't play it.
-- Ted Ray
My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying.
-- Ed Furgol
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.
-- Renee Hicks
It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course.
-- Hank Aaron
I had a wonderful experience on the golf course today. I had a hole in nothing. Missed the ball and sank the divot.
-- Don Adams
I have a tip that can take 5 strokes off anyone's golf game. It's called an eraser.
-- Arnold Palmer
I know I'm getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators.
-- Gerald R. Ford
The reason they call if 'golf' is that all the other 4 letter words were used up.
-- Leslie Nielsen
The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf - it's almost a law.
-- H. G. Wells (Bealby, 1915)
Eighteen holes of match or medal play will teach you more about your foe than will 18 years of dealing with him across a desk. ~Grantland Rice
Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five. ~John Updike
It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place this world is when one is playing golf. ~Robert Lynd
Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad. ~A.A. Milne
Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious. ~P.G. Wodehouse, A Mixed Threesome, 1922
I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game: it's called an eraser. ~Arnold Palmer
Golf is a game that is played on a five-inch course - the distance between your ears. ~Bobby Jones
I'm about five inches from being an outstanding golfer. That's the distance my left ear is from my right. ~Ben Crenshaw
Golf is like a love affair. If you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart. ~Arthur Daley
Golf is a fascinating game. It has taken me nearly forty years to discover that I can't play it. ~Ted Ray, Golf - My Slice of Life, 1972
The number of shots taken by an opponent who is out of sight is equal to the square root of the sum of the number of curses heard plus the number of swishes. ~Michael Green, The Art of Coarse Golf, 1975
If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out. ~Paul Gallico
Golf is like an 18-year-old girl with big boobs. You know it's wrong but you can't keep away from her. ~Val Doonican
Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic. ~Author Unknown
It's easy to see golf not as a game at all but as some whey-faced, nineteenth-century Presbyterian minister's fever dream of exorcism achieved through ritual and self-mortification. ~Bruce McCall
Forget your opponents; always play against par. ~Sam Snead
If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is. ~Horace G. Hutchinson
They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that. ~Gardner Dickinson
I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies. ~Will Rogers
If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death. ~Sam Snead
Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness. ~William Wordsworth
What other people may find in poetry or art museums, I find in the flight of a good drive. ~Arnold Palmer
The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing. ~Phyllis Diller
Fifty years ago, 100 white men chasing one black man across a field was called the Ku Klux Klan. Today it's called the PGA Tour. ~Author Unknown
A game in which you claim the privileges of age, and retain the playthings of childhood. ~Author Unknown, plagiarized from the Samuel Johnson quotation "It is a hopeless endeavour to unite the contrarieties of spring and winter; it is unjust to claim the priveleges of age, and retain the play-things of childhood." (Thank you, Frank Lynch.)
Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick. ~P.J. O'Rourke
The sport of choice for the urban poor is basketball. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is bowling. The sport of choice for front-line workers is football. The sport of choice for supervisors is baseball. The sport of choice for middle management is tennis. The sport of choice for corporate officers is golf. Conclusion: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become. ~Author Unknown
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. ~Dean Martin
Golf gives you an insight into human nature, your own as well as your opponent's. ~Grantland Rice
Golf is a good walk spoiled. ~Mark Twain
I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles. ~G.K. Chesterton
They throw their clubs backwards, and that's wrong. You should always throw a club ahead of you so that you don't have to walk any extra distance to get it. ~Tommy Bolt, about the tempers of modern players
If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business. ~Joey Adams
Man blames fate for other accidents but feels personally responsible for a hole in one. ~Martha Beckman
When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. ~Author Unknown
I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced. ~Attributed to both Miller Barber and Lee Trevino
Duffers who consistently shank their balls are urged to buy and study Shanks - No Thanks by R.K. Hoffman, or in extreme cases, M.S. Howard's excellent Tennis for Beginners. ~Henry Beard, Golfing, 1985
Golf is life. If you can't take golf, you can't take life. ~Author Unknown
In baseball you hit your home run over the right-field fence, the left-field fence, the center-field fence. Nobody cares. In golf everything has got to be right over second base. ~Ken Harrelson
If I can hit a curveball, why can't I hit a ball that is standing still on a course? ~Larry Nelson
Golf balls are attracted to water as unerringly as the eye of a middle-aged man to a female bosom. ~Michael Green, The Art of Coarse Golf, 1967
If your opponent is playing several shots in vain attempts to extricate himself from a bunker, do not stand near him and audibly count his strokes. It would be justifiable homicide if he wound up his pitiable exhibition by applying his niblick to your head. ~Harry Vardon
Real golfers, no matter what the provocation, never strike a caddie with the driver. The sand wedge is far more effective. ~Huxtable Pippey
A passion, an obsession, a romance, a nice acquaintanceship with trees, sand, and water. ~Bob Ryan
Drugs are very much a part of professional sports today, but when you think about it, golf is the only sport where the players aren't penalized for being on grass. ~Bob Hope
Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn't a lot of strokes when you consider the course. ~Lee Trevino
I've spent most of my life golfing... the rest I've just wasted. ~Author Unknown
They call it golf because all of the other four-letter words were taken. ~Raymond Floyd
My handicap? Woods and irons. ~Chris Codiroli
The golf swing is like a suitcase into which we are trying to pack one too many things. ~John Updike
Even God has to practice his putting. ~Golf Saying
Actually, the only time I ever took out a one-iron was to kill a tarantula. And it took a seven to do that. ~Jim Murray
The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody put a flagstick on top. ~Pete Dye
I'd play every day if I could. It's cheaper than a shrink and there are no telephones on my golf cart. ~Brent Musburger
If you're caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron. ~Lee Trevino
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun. ~Jim Bishop
I'm hitting the woods just great, but I'm having a terrible time getting out of them. ~Harry Toscano
I know I am getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators. ~Gerald Ford
"Play it as it lies" is one of the fundamental dictates of golf. The other is "Wear it if it clashes." ~Henry Beard, Golfing, 1985
I just hope I don't have to explain all the times I've used His name in vain when I get up there. ~Bob Hope, about his golfing
I can airmail the golf ball, but sometimes I don't put the right address on it. ~Jim Dent
It is more satisfying to be a bad player at golf. The worse you play, the better you remember the occasional good shot. ~Nubar Gulbenkian, 1972
Some of us worship in churches, some in synagogues, some on golf courses. ~Adlai Stevenson
I would like to deny all allegations by Bob Hope that during my last game of golf, I hit an eagle, a birdie, an elk and a moose. ~Gerald Ford
The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off. I shot the happiest 83 of my life. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez
A golf course is nothing but a poolroom moved outdoors. ~Barry Fitzgerald, Going My Way
I'll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105. ~Bob Hope
After all these years, it's still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez, on his Puerto Rican accent
My swing is so bad I look like a caveman killing his lunch. ~Lee Trevino
Playing the game I have learned the meaning of humility. It has given me an understanding of futility of the human effort. ~Abba Eban
It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. ~Hank Aaron, 1971
Swinging at daisies is like playing electric guitar with a tennis racket: if it were that easy, we could all be Jerry Garcia. The ball changes everything. ~Michael Bamberger
One of the most fascinating things about golf is how it reflects the cycle of life. No matter what you shoot - the next day you have to go back to the first tee and begin all over again and make yourself into something. ~Peter Jacobsen
You are meant to play the ball as it lies, a fact that may help to touch on your own objective approach to life. ~Grantland Rice
A golf ball is like a clock. Always hit it at 6 o'clock and make it go toward 12 o'clock. But make sure you're in the same time zone. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez
Golf isn't like other sports where you can take a player out if he's having a bad day. You have to play the whole game. ~Phil Blackmar
The trouble that most of us find with the modern matched sets of clubs is that they don't really seem to know any more about the game than the old ones did. ~Robert Browning, A History of Golf
Golf is the cruelest game, because eventually it will drag you out in front of the whole school, take your lunch money and slap you around. ~Rick Reilly, "Master Strokes," Sports Illustrated
Golf is the cruelest of sports. Like life, it's unfair. It's a harlot. A trollop. It leads you on. It never lives up to its promises.... It's a boulevard of broken dreams. It plays with men. And runs off with the butcher. ~Jim Murray
Golf is essentially an exercise in masochism conducted out-of-doors. ~Paul O'Neil
Golf is an open exhibition of overweening ambition, courage deflated by stupidity, skill scoured by a whiff of arrogance. ~Alistair Cooke
No game designed to be played with the aid of personal servants by right-handed men who can't even bring along their dogs can be entirely good for the soul. ~Bruce McCall, "The Case Against Golf," Esquire
These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow. ~Sam Snead
Through years of experience I have found that air offers less resistance than dirt. ~Jack Nicklaus, on why he tees his ball high.
Golf is not a game, it's bondage. It was obviously devised by a man torn with guilt, eager to atone for his sins. ~Jim Murray
Golf is an awkward set of bodily contortions designed to produce a graceful result. ~Tommy Armour
Who watches golf on TV? Who calls eight friends over and gets a keg of beer? Landscapers, I guess. They sit around the TV, yelling, "Will you look at that golf path? Pure pea gravel." ~Jeff Cesario
But you don't have to go up in the stands and play your foul balls. I do. ~Sam Snead, to Ted Williams, arguing which was more difficult, to hit a moving baseball or a stationary golf ball
A hole in one is amazing when you think of the different universes this white mass of molecules has to pass through on its way to the hole. ~Mac O'Grady
Trevino is in a league by himself. We don't even count him. We figure when you come in second, you're a winner. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez
Golf is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six, and write down five. ~Paul Harvey
In golf, you keep your head down and follow through. In the vice presidency, you keep your head up and follow through. It's a big difference. ~Dan Quayle
You can't call it a sport. You don't run, jump, you don't shoot, you don't pass. All you have to do is buy some clothes that don't match. ~Steve Sax
The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil. ~Author Unknown
One under a tree, one under a bush, one under the water. ~Lee Trevino, describing how he was one under during a tournament
The average golfer doesn't play golf. He attacks it. ~Jack Burke
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. ~Tiger Woods
The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of butterflies in the adjoining meadows. ~P.G. Wodehouse
It's so bad I could putt off a tabletop and still leave the ball halfway down the leg. ~J.C. Snead, on his putting
Any game where a man 60 can beat a man 30 ain't no game. ~Burt Shotten
There are two things you can do with your head down - play golf and pray. ~Lee Trevino
Golf is not just an exercise; it's an adventure, a romance... a Shakespeare play in which disaster and comedy are intertwined. ~Harold Segall
The worst club in my bag is my brain. ~Chris Perry
Golf is a game where white men can dress up as black pimps and get away with it. ~Robin Williams, 1986
Golf is hockey at the halt. ~Arthur Marshall, 1985
There is one thing in this world that is dumber than playing golf. That is watching someone else playing golf. What do you actually get to see? Thirty-seven guys in polyester slacks squinting at the sun. Doesn't that set your blood racing? ~Peter Andrews
The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law. ~H.G. Wells, Bealby, 1915
[Golf] is like chasing a quinine pill around a cow pasture. ~Winston Churchill
The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. ~Ernest Hemingway
One of the advantages bowling has over golf is that you seldom lose a bowling ball. ~Don Carter
I'm a golfaholic, no question about that. Counseling wouldn't help me. They'd have to put me in prison, and then I'd talk the warden into building a hole or two and teach him how to play. ~Lee Trevino
A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers, neither of whom can putt very well. ~Author Unknown
Give me the fresh air, a beautiful partner, and a nice round of golf, and you can keep the fresh air and the round of golf. ~Jack Benny
Golf is a game in which the ball lies poorly and the players well. ~Art Rosenbaum
Art said he wanted to get more distance. I told him to hit it and run backward. ~Ken Venturi, on Art Rosenbaum
One thing about golf is you don't know why you play bad and why you play good. ~George Archer
Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards? ~Al Boliska
If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, let him. ~Bob Hope
Golf is the most fun you can have without taking your clothes off. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez
"After all, golf is only a game," said Millicent. Women say these things without thinking. It does not mean that there is a kink in their character. They simply don't realise what they are saying. ~P.G. Wodehouse, Order by Golf, 1922
When I putt, my emotions collide like tectonic plates. It's left my memory circuits full of scars that won't heal. ~Mac O'Grady
The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. ~Billy Graham
That son of a bitch was able to hole a putt over 60 feet of peanut brittle. ~Lloyd Mangrum, about Bobby Locke
Golf is not, on the whole, a game for realists. By its exactitudes of measurements it invites the attention of perfectionists. ~Heywood Hale Broun
Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun? ~Bob Hope
His driving is unbelievable. I don't go that far on my holidays. ~Ian Baker-Finch, on John Daly
John certainly gives it a good hit, doesn't he? My Sunday best is a Wednesday afternoon compared to him. ~Nick Faldo, on John Daly
I never pray to God to make a putt. I pray to God to help me react good if I miss a putt. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez
Golf seems to me an arduous way to go for a walk. I prefer to take the dogs out. ~Princess Anne of Great Britain
One minute you're bleeding. The next minute you're hemorrhaging. The next minute you're painting the Mona Lisa. ~Mac O'Grady, describing a typical round of golf
If you wish to hide your character, do not play golf. ~Percey Boomer
Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing. ~Ben Hogan
Yeah, after each of my downhill putts. ~Homero Blancas, asked if he had any uphill putts
When you hear someone shout "You da man," if he ain't shouting at Arnold Palmer, then it ain't da man. ~Ron Green, Charlotte Observer
Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle. ~Author Unknown
What's nice about our tour is you can't remember your bad shots. ~Bob Bruce, about the senior tour
Golf is golf. You hit the ball, you go find it. Then you hit it again. ~Lon Hinkle
To some golfers, the greatest handicap is the ability to add correctly. ~Author Unknown
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. ~Jack Lemmon
I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play. ~Joe E. Lewis
The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. ~Will Rogers
I don't like watching golf on TV. I can't stand whispering. ~David Brenner
One almost expects one of the players to peer into the monitor and politely request viewers to refrain from munching so loudly on cheese and crackers while the golfers are trying to reach the greens. ~Pete Alfano
Golf without mistakes is like watching haircuts. A dinner without wine. ~Jim Murray
Men who would face torture without a word become blasphemous at the short fourteenth. It is clear that the game of golf may well be included in that category of intolerable provocations which may legally excuse or mitigate behaviour not otherwise excusable. ~A.P. Herbert, Misleading Cases, 1935
If I had my way, any man guilty of golf would be barred from any public office in the United States and the families of the breed would be shipped off to the white slave corrals of Argentina. ~H.L. Mencken
All I've got against it is that it takes you so far from the clubhouse. ~Eric Linklater, Poet's Pub, 1929
Baseball players quit playing and they take up golf. Basketball players quit, take up golf. Football players quit, take up golf. What are we supposed to take up when we quit? ~George Archer
A golf course outside a big town serves an excellent purpose in that it segregates, as though a concentration camp, all the idle and idiot well-to-do. ~Osbert Sitwell
If you want to take long walks, take long walks. If you want to hit things with sticks, hit things with sticks. But there's no excuse for combining the two and putting the results on TV. Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns. ~National Lampoon, 1979
It's good sportsmanship not to pick up lost balls while they are still rolling. ~Mark Twain
Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty. ~Harry Vardon
Golf is an ineffectual attempt to put an elusive ball into an obscure hole with implements ill-adapted to the purpose. ~Woodrow Wilson
A golfer's diet: live on greens as much as possible. ~Author Unknown
Gone golfin'... be back dark thirty. ~Author Unknown
Born to golf. Forced to work. ~Author Unknown
My body is here, but my mind has already teed off. ~Author Unknown
Find a man with both feet firmly on the ground and you've found a man about to make a difficult putt. ~Fletcher Knebel
Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them. ~Jimmy DeMaret
May thy ball lie in green pastures... and not in still waters. ~Author Unknown
If I hit it right, it's a slice. If I hit it left, it's a hook. If I hit it straight, it's a miracle. ~Author Unknown
If you call on God to improve the results of a shot while it is still in motion, you are using "an outside agency" and subject to appropriate penalties under the rules of golf. ~Henry Longhurst
The difference between golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. ~George Deukmejian
.The only hole in one I got was in my socks.
To get more distance out of your drives, hit the ball and run backwards!
I've always made a total effort, even when the odds seemed entirely against me. I never quit trying; I never felt that I didn't have a chance to win." -Arnold Palmer
"Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more about your foe than nineteen years of dealing with him across the desk." -Grantland Rice
"The fundamental problem with golf is that every so often, no matter how lacking you may be in the essential virtues required of a steady player, the odds are that one day you will hit the ball straight, hard, and out of sight. This is the essential frustration of this excruciating sport. For when you've done it once, you make the fundamental error of asking yourself why you can't do this all the time. The answer to this question is simple: the first time was a fluke." -Colin Bowles
"Talking to a golf ball won't do you any good. Unless you do it while your opponent is teeing off." -Bruce Lansky
"If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball." -Jack Lemmon
"When I'm on a golf course and it starts to rain and lightning, I hold up my one iron, 'caus I know even God can't hit a one iron." -Lee Trevino
"I'll always remember the day I broke ninety. I had a few beers in the clubhouse and was so excited I forgot to play the back nine." -Bruce Lansky
"As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round." -Ben Hogan
"My best score ever was 103, but I've only been playing 15 years." -Alex Karris
"Golf is the hardest game in the world to play, and the easiest to cheat at." -Dave Hill
"Never bet with anyone you meet on the first tee, who has a deep suntan, a one iron in his bag and squinty eyes." -Dave Marr
"The golf swing is like sex. You can't be thinking about the mechanics of the act while you are performing." -Dave Hill
"Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into a even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose." -Winston Churchill
"Relax? How can anybody relax and play golf? You have to grip the club don't you?" -Ben Hogan
"You don't know what pressure is until you've played for five dollars a hole with only two in your pocket."-Lee Trevino
"Golf is a game in which you yell 'fore', shoot six and write down five." -Paul Harvey
"A lot of guys who have have never choked, have never been in the position to do so." -Tom Watson
"I'm hitting the woods just great, but I'm having a terrible time getting out of them" -Harry Tofcano
"Golf is a game where guts and blind devotion will always net you absolutely nothing but an ulcer." -Tommy Bolt
"Golf is based on honesty, where else would you admit to a seven on a par three?" -Jimmy Demaret
"It's nice to have the opportunity to play for so much money, but it's nicer to win it." -Patty Sheenan
"I play with friends, but we don't play friendly games." -Ben Hogan
"Golf is an ideal diversion, but a ruinous disease." -Bertie Forbes
"Putts get real difficult the day they hand out the money." -Lee Trevino
"There are no points for style when it comes to putting. It's getting the ball in the cup that counts." -Brian Swarbrick
"Golf is twenty percent mechanics and technique. The other eighty percent is philosophy, humor, tragedy, romance, melodrama, companionship, camaraderie, cussedness, and conversation." -Grantland Rice
"The harder you work, the luckier you get." -Gary Player "Victory is everything. You can spend the money, but you can never spend the memories." -Ken Venturi
"Golf is 90 percent inspiration and 10 percent perspiration." -Johnny Miller
"The number one thing about trouble is...don't get into more." -Dave Stockton
"It's the most fun I've had with my clothes on." -Lee Trevino
"Mulligan: invented by an Irishman who wanted to hit one more twenty yard grounder." -Jim Bishop
"If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf." -Bob Hope
"The only shots you can be sure of are those you've had already." -Byron Nelson
"Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at it." -Jimmy Demaret
"Most golfers prepare for disaster. A good golfer prepares for success." -Bob Toski
"You've just one problem. You stand too close to the ball after you've hit it." -Sam Snead
"The fun you get from golf is in direct ratio to the effort you don't put into it." -Bob Allen
"Golf is good walk spoiled." -Mark Twain
"We have fifty-one golf courses in Palm Springs. He(Gerald Ford) never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot...At least he can't cheat on his score- because all you have to do is look back down the fairway and count the wounded." -Bob Hope
"You can't lose an old golf ball." -John Willis
"Indeed, the highest pleasure of golf may be that on the fairways and far from all the pressures of commerce and rationality, we can feel immortal for a few hours." -Colman McCarthy
"My game is so bad I gotta hire three caddies- one to walk the left rough, one for the right, and one for the middle. And the one in the middle doesn't have much to do." -Dave Hill
"When he gets the ball into a tough place, that's when he's most relaxed. I think it's because he has so much experience at it." -Don Christopher(Jack Lemmon's Caddie)
"A professional will tell you the amount of flex you need in the shaft of your club. The more the flex, the more strength you will need to break the thing over your knees." -Stephen Baker
"There are three ways of learning golf: by study, which is the most wearisome; by imitation, which is the most fallacious; and by experience, which is the most bitter." -Robert Browning
"Why am I using a new putter? Because the last one didn't float too well." -Craig Stadler
"Obviously a deer on the fairway has seen you tee off before and knows that the safest place to be when you play is right down the middle." -Jackie Gleason
"I'd like to see the fairways more narrow. Then everybody would have to play from the rough, not just me." -Seve Ballesteros
"We speak of eyeball-to-eyeball encounters between men great and small. Even more reaching and revealing of character is the eyeball-to-golfball confrontation, whereby our most secret natures are mercilessly tested by a small, round, whitish object with no mind or will but with a very definite life of its own, and with whims perverse and beatific." -John Stewart Martin
"Be funny on a golf course? Do I kid my best friend's mother about her heart condition?" -Phil Silvers
"The reason the golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing." -Phyllis Diller
"I'd give up golf if I didn't have so many sweaters." -Bob Hope
"The person I fear most in the last two rounds is myself." -Tom Watson
" Everybody has two swings-a beautiful practice swing and the choked-up one with with which they hit the ball. So it wouldn't do either of us a damned bit of good to look at your practice swing." -Ed Furgol
"If your caddie coaches you on the tee, 'Hit it down the left side with a little draw,' ignore him. All you do on the tee is try not to hit the caddie." -Jim Murray
"Always throw your clubs ahead of you. That way you don't have to waste energy going back to pick them up." -Tommy Bolt
"Always keep in mind that if God didn't want a man to have mulligans, golf balls wouldn't come three to a sleeve." -Dan Jenkins
"I know I'm getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators." -Gerald Ford
"Competitive golf is played mainly on a five-and-a-half-inch course, the space between your ears." -Bobby Jones
"Actually, the only time I ever took out a one iron was to kill a tarantula. And I took a seven to do that." -Jim Murry
"The right way to play golf is to go up and hit the bloody thing." -George Duncan
"If you pick up a golfer and hold it close to your ear, like a conch shell, and listen- you will hear an alibi." -Fred Beck
"He enjoys that perfect peace, that peace beyond all understanding, which comes at its maximum only to the man who has given up golf." -P.G. Wodehouse
"I played like s___." -Greg Norman after the Masters.
"Every rock'n'roll band I know, guys with long hair and tattoos, plays golf now." -Alice Cooper, 47.
"Golf tips are like aspirin. One may do you good, but if you swallow the whole bottle you will be lucky to survive." -Harvey Penick
"Nobody asked how you looked, just what you shot." -Sam Snead (Tnx..JP)
"Happiness is a long walk with a putter." -Greg Norman (Tnx..JoeT)
"You know what they say about big hitters...the woods are full of them." -Jimmy Demaret (Tnx..TZ)
"Golf is an easy game...It's just hard to play." -unknown (Tnx..KK) "Playing golf is just like going to a strip club. You're all revved up, ready to go. But three hours later, you're depressed, plastered, and most of your balls are missing." -James Clark (tnx..LC)
"..corr blimey O'Reilly" - Peter Alliss is astounded by a put or shot at the British Open (Tnx..CM)
"The mind messes up more shots than the body." Tommy Bolt (Tnx..AC)
"In Africa some of the native tribes have a custom of beating the ground with clubs and uttering spine chilling cries. Anthropologists call this a form of self expression. In America we call it golf."- Becker (Tnx..bs, who's becker?)
"Golf is a sport in which the ball lies poorly but the player well" -Unknown (Tnx..clv)
"They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. It's more complicated than that." -Gardner Dickinson (ditto)
“Golf is like marbles for adults”- unknown (Thanks..EMcC)
In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled “Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden”. . . and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.- Not a quote but a word origin from J.Brown..tnx
GOLF SAYINGS
1. Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by
the occasional miracle.
2. "I wish I could play my normal game...just once."
3. "Golf is harder than baseball. In golf, you have to play your foul
balls."
4. If you find you do not mind playing golf in the rain, the snow, even
during a hurricane, here's a valuable tip: your life is in trouble.
5. Golfers who try to make everything perfect before taking the shot
rarely make a perfect shot.
6. The term "mulligan" is really a contraction of the phrase "maul it
again."
7. A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two
golfers...neither of whom can putt very well.
8. An interesting thing about golf is that no matter how badly you play;
it is always possible to get worse.
9. Golf's a hard game to figure. One day you'll go out and slice it and
shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you
go out and for no reason at all you really stink.
10. I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.
11. If your best shots are the practice swing and the "gimme Putt", you
might wish to reconsider this game.
12. Achieving a certain level of success in golf is only important if you
can finally enjoy the level you've reached after you've reached it.
13. Golf is the only sport where the most feared opponent is you.
14. Golf is like marriage: If you take yourself too seriously it won't
work... and both are expensive.
15. The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil.
16. To some golfers, the greatest handicap is the ability to add
correctly.
17. In golf, some people tend to get confused with all the numbers...
they shoot a "six," yell "fore" and write "five".
18. Swing easy. Hit hard.
19. If you find yourself pleased that you locate more balls in the rough
than you actually have lost, your focus is totally wrong and your
personality might not be right for golf...it is also just a matter of
time before the IRS investigates your business.
20. Why is it twice as difficult to hit a ball over water than sand?
21. Golf! You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the
ball goes right. The lowest score wins. And on top of that, the winner
buys the drinks.
Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more about your foe than 18 years of dealing with him across a desk. ~Grantland Rice
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. ~ George Deukmejian
Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe. ~ Author Unknown
Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five. ~John Updike
It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. ~Robert Lynd
If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is. ~Horace G. Hutchinson
They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that.
~Gardner Dickinson
If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death. ~Sam Snead
Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness. ~William Wordsworth
Golf is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six, and write down five. ~ Paul Harvey
Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. ~Jack Benny
Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards? ~ Al Boliska
Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing.~ Ben Hogan
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. ~ Jack Lemmon
It is good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. ~ Mark Twain
Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose. ~ Woodrow Wilson
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. ~Dean Martin
If you are going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don't have to waste energy going back to pick it up. ~Tommy Bolt
Man blames fate for other accidents, but feels personally responsible when he makes a hole in one. ~Author Unknown
I don't say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they'd come up sliced.
~Author Unknown
I have spent most of my life golfing ..... the rest I have just wasted. ~ Author Unknown
The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag stick on top. ~ Pete Dye
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun. ~ Jim Bishop
I am hitting the woods just great ..... but having a terrible time getting out of them! ~ Author Unknown
I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators. ~ Gerald Ford
My handicap? Woods and irons. ~Chris Codiroli
The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag stick on top.
~Pete Dye
I'm hitting the woods just great ....but having a terrible time getting out of them!
~Author Unknown
The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. ~Billy Graham
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
~Jack Lemmon
It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
~Mark Twain
Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty. ~Harry Vardon
Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them.
~Jimmy DeMaret
May thy ball lie in green pastures .... and not in still waters. ~Author Unknown
If I hit it right, it's a slice. If I hit it left, it's a hook. If I hit it straight, it's a miracle.
~Author Unknown
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie.
~George Deukmejian
Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe.
~Author Unknowns
Retirement Quotes
May you have all the happiness
And luck that life can hold -
And at the end of your rainbows
May you find a pot of gold.
As a chapter closes
in your life
And a new one
starts for you,
May your years
be filled
with all the things
you're looking forward to!
Enjoy
Retiring" is not how
I would describe you.
I have a feeling that
it is the beginning of another
exciting chapter in your life.
Whatever retirement means to you,
may it bring greater
personal fulfillment
than you ever thought possible.
Congratulations
Retirement is when you stop living at
work and begin working at living!
Retirement life is at your pace...what a wonderful gift.
A lifetime of work behind you...a chance to begin again. Enjoy the adventure.
Now that you're retiring and you'll be spending the day goofing off, think of the gang back at the office...spending the day goofing off.
Now that you are retiring, when someone says "have a nice day", you actually have a shot at it.
Retirement definition
R: Rising when one wishes to
E: Even on weekdays
T: Taking trips in trailers too
I: Independence on the freeways
R: Reading, fishing, playing cards
E: Even time to volunteer
M: managing to keep the yard
E: Exactly right this year
N: nestling on the front porch swing
T: taking classes, too.
Hoping all these lovely things,
Retirement brings to you."
The trouble with retirement is that
you never get a day off.
And luck that life can hold -
And at the end of your rainbows
May you find a pot of gold.
As a chapter closes
in your life
And a new one
starts for you,
May your years
be filled
with all the things
you're looking forward to!
Enjoy
Retiring" is not how
I would describe you.
I have a feeling that
it is the beginning of another
exciting chapter in your life.
Whatever retirement means to you,
may it bring greater
personal fulfillment
than you ever thought possible.
Congratulations
Retirement is when you stop living at
work and begin working at living!
Retirement life is at your pace...what a wonderful gift.
A lifetime of work behind you...a chance to begin again. Enjoy the adventure.
Now that you're retiring and you'll be spending the day goofing off, think of the gang back at the office...spending the day goofing off.
Now that you are retiring, when someone says "have a nice day", you actually have a shot at it.
Retirement definition
R: Rising when one wishes to
E: Even on weekdays
T: Taking trips in trailers too
I: Independence on the freeways
R: Reading, fishing, playing cards
E: Even time to volunteer
M: managing to keep the yard
E: Exactly right this year
N: nestling on the front porch swing
T: taking classes, too.
Hoping all these lovely things,
Retirement brings to you."
The trouble with retirement is that
you never get a day off.
Baby Quotes
B is for Boy – may he fill your lives with happiness and your hearts with love.
It is time for blocks and tiny socks
Blankets, bib and toys
For rocking chairs and teddy bears
A million brand new joys ……..
Warmest congratulations and best wishes to you and your new baby
Sugar and spice, everything nice, what could be sweeter than a new baby girl to love.
It's time for blocks and tiny socks, blankets, bibs, and toys, For rocking chairs and teddy bears, a million brand new joys... Warmest congratulations and best wishes to you and your new baby.
He’s Perfect From the first precious hug to the bond that continues to grow, There’s a beautiful connection – that only a parent can know. Enjoy every moment with your new son. Congratulations
Your new little bundle of sunshine will fill your home with happiness and your heart with love. Congratulations and Best Wishes.
Get ready… for the warmth, the touch, the smiles, the love of a new baby! Congratulations on your miracle-to-be!
We wish you soft lullabies and smiles of joy. Hearts that will listen and gentle hands to hold. But most of all, we wish you love. Welcome to the world sweet baby girl.
Get ready… for the warmth, the touch, the smiles, the love of a new baby! Congratulations on your miracle-to-be!
Baby girls change everything- for the better. Congratulations.
Being a new grandma is a BIG responsibility... Better get to spoiling now! Congratulations
It's a girl! Congratulations on your sweet little bundle of joy!
Heard your world was turned upside-down! Congratulations on your twins!
Sleeping quietly in the land of wishes, care and hope and dream-filled kisses, guided by angels and the heavens above, a sweet little child is born into a world of love. What joy awaits you! Congratulations
The moon sang a lullaby and a star danced in heaven on the day you were born. Heaven Sent
Wishing you... and your baby boy... lots of love... and lots of fun… and a whole new world… of happiness! Congratulations!
A baby is a blessing
A gift from Heaven above,
A precious little angel
To cherish and to love
Baby fair, baby sweet,
Angel kisses on your feet.
Tiny dancer on the wing,
Your new voice is here to sing.
Baby precious, baby mild,
Welcome, welcome brand new child.
Little hands and little feet,
Little toothless grins so sweet,
Little eyes that shine so bright,
Little arms to hug you tight –
Everythings little except your joy
when you have a new baby boy.
The world is filled with wonder and always a joy
When you share your life with a cute little boy.
Babies are such a nice way to start people.
A new baby is like the beginning of all things - wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities.
There is nothing quite as darling
As a baby sweet and small
And the love that they bring
Is the greatest gift of all.
Ten tiny little fingers that always want to play,
That never stop exploring the wonder of today.
Ten tiny little fingers that from the very start,
Will reach out for tomorrow, yet always hold your heart.
Author: unknown
A baby boy is full of surprises and magic
and discoveries just waiting to be born.
A baby boy grabs hold of our fingers,
imagination and always, our hearts.
A baby boy reminds us of all that is good
and innocent and beautiful in our lives.
A baby boy is love!
Twins - Like two peas in a pod, two gifts from God.
Two faces to wash
And four dirty hands;
Two insistent voices
Making demands.
Twice as much crying
When things go wrong;
Then four eyes closing
With slumber song.
Twice as many garments
Blowing on the line.
Two cherubs in the go cart,
Soaking up sunshine.
Work I do for twins
Naturally comes double,
But four arms to hug me
Repay all my trouble.
Author: Azalete Bolger Wells
Little boys are treasures
Who are worth their weight in gold,
And charm everyone around them
From the time they're hours old.
They're Mommy's little darlings
They're a special pal to Dad
and they bring the very happiest days
A family's ever had.
Two of the most satisfying experiences in life are, being a grandchild, and becoming a grandparent
A baby will make love stronger
Days shorter, Nights longer
Bankroll smaller, Clothes shabbier,
The past forgotten,
And the future worth living for.
With babies come toys
and a whole world of joys,
and all kinds of fun things to do.
With babies come laughter
and love ever after...
With babies,
sweet dreams all come true
In a world that's all brand-new,
Babies have so much to do!
Laughing, making funny faces,
Finding out those ticklish places...
Cuddling up and wiggling toes,
Looking cute in tiny clothes...
Tasting, touching, reaching high,
Crawling under, scooting by...
Learning words and having fun...
Making memories one by one.
Dear little bare feet, dimpled and white,
In your long nightgown wrapped up for the night;
Come, let me count all your sweet little toes,
Pink as the heart of a shell or a rose.
One is a lady who sits in the sun,
Two is a baby and three is a nun,
Four is a lily with innocent breast
Five is a birdie asleep in the nest.
Little hands and little feet,
Little toothless grins so sweet,
Little eyes that shine so bright,
Little arms to hold you tight.
What a wonderful Miracle from God!
There's a new little baby
at your house,
As sweet as a baby
can be...
Bringing such joy
and excitement
To a very nice family...
Promising wonderful moments
Of laughter, enjoyment,
and fun...
May your dreams
for a wonderful future
Be fulfilled
with your new "Little One"!
A new little baby
to cuddle and love
To spoil just a little
and think the world of,
A bundle from Heaven
to simply adore,
Now who in the world
could ask for more!
Ten tiny little fingers that always want to play,
That never stop exploring the wonder of today.
Ten tiny little fingers that from the very start,
Will reach out for tomorrow, yet always hold your heart.
Babies are always more trouble than you thought - and more wonderful than you ever dreamed. - Charles Osgood
Babies are blessings sent from above
Babies are bundles from heaven
A baby is a bit of star dust blown from the hand of God!
A baby is cuddles and tickles on toes,
A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. - Carl Sandburg
A baby is sunshine, is moonbeams and more... brightening your world like never before.
Baby's Poem
A gift from above,
A family treasure for all to love.
Ten tiny fingers wrapped in a ball,
One day soon you'll be big and tall.
Dreams cannot hold you small as today...
Your hand print and picture will hold it this way!
Children are one third of our population and all of our future. - The Promotion of Child Health, 1981
For this child I prayed, and the Lord has given me my petition which I asked of Him. - 1 Samuel 1:27
God lent us an angel, a gift from heaven above.
He/she will fill your lives with sunshine and your hearts with love.
A Man's Diaper Instructions:
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. - Jimmy Piersal, on How to Diaper a Baby, 1968
A precious new baby has come from above to live in your hearts and fill them with love
She/he will fill your lives with sunshine and your hearts with love.
Ten little fingers, ten perfect toes, fill your hearts with love that overflows.
It is time for blocks and tiny socks
Blankets, bib and toys
For rocking chairs and teddy bears
A million brand new joys ……..
Warmest congratulations and best wishes to you and your new baby
Sugar and spice, everything nice, what could be sweeter than a new baby girl to love.
It's time for blocks and tiny socks, blankets, bibs, and toys, For rocking chairs and teddy bears, a million brand new joys... Warmest congratulations and best wishes to you and your new baby.
He’s Perfect From the first precious hug to the bond that continues to grow, There’s a beautiful connection – that only a parent can know. Enjoy every moment with your new son. Congratulations
Your new little bundle of sunshine will fill your home with happiness and your heart with love. Congratulations and Best Wishes.
Get ready… for the warmth, the touch, the smiles, the love of a new baby! Congratulations on your miracle-to-be!
We wish you soft lullabies and smiles of joy. Hearts that will listen and gentle hands to hold. But most of all, we wish you love. Welcome to the world sweet baby girl.
Get ready… for the warmth, the touch, the smiles, the love of a new baby! Congratulations on your miracle-to-be!
Baby girls change everything- for the better. Congratulations.
Being a new grandma is a BIG responsibility... Better get to spoiling now! Congratulations
It's a girl! Congratulations on your sweet little bundle of joy!
Heard your world was turned upside-down! Congratulations on your twins!
Sleeping quietly in the land of wishes, care and hope and dream-filled kisses, guided by angels and the heavens above, a sweet little child is born into a world of love. What joy awaits you! Congratulations
The moon sang a lullaby and a star danced in heaven on the day you were born. Heaven Sent
Wishing you... and your baby boy... lots of love... and lots of fun… and a whole new world… of happiness! Congratulations!
A baby is a blessing
A gift from Heaven above,
A precious little angel
To cherish and to love
Baby fair, baby sweet,
Angel kisses on your feet.
Tiny dancer on the wing,
Your new voice is here to sing.
Baby precious, baby mild,
Welcome, welcome brand new child.
Little hands and little feet,
Little toothless grins so sweet,
Little eyes that shine so bright,
Little arms to hug you tight –
Everythings little except your joy
when you have a new baby boy.
The world is filled with wonder and always a joy
When you share your life with a cute little boy.
Babies are such a nice way to start people.
A new baby is like the beginning of all things - wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities.
There is nothing quite as darling
As a baby sweet and small
And the love that they bring
Is the greatest gift of all.
Ten tiny little fingers that always want to play,
That never stop exploring the wonder of today.
Ten tiny little fingers that from the very start,
Will reach out for tomorrow, yet always hold your heart.
Author: unknown
A baby boy is full of surprises and magic
and discoveries just waiting to be born.
A baby boy grabs hold of our fingers,
imagination and always, our hearts.
A baby boy reminds us of all that is good
and innocent and beautiful in our lives.
A baby boy is love!
Twins - Like two peas in a pod, two gifts from God.
Two faces to wash
And four dirty hands;
Two insistent voices
Making demands.
Twice as much crying
When things go wrong;
Then four eyes closing
With slumber song.
Twice as many garments
Blowing on the line.
Two cherubs in the go cart,
Soaking up sunshine.
Work I do for twins
Naturally comes double,
But four arms to hug me
Repay all my trouble.
Author: Azalete Bolger Wells
Little boys are treasures
Who are worth their weight in gold,
And charm everyone around them
From the time they're hours old.
They're Mommy's little darlings
They're a special pal to Dad
and they bring the very happiest days
A family's ever had.
Two of the most satisfying experiences in life are, being a grandchild, and becoming a grandparent
A baby will make love stronger
Days shorter, Nights longer
Bankroll smaller, Clothes shabbier,
The past forgotten,
And the future worth living for.
With babies come toys
and a whole world of joys,
and all kinds of fun things to do.
With babies come laughter
and love ever after...
With babies,
sweet dreams all come true
In a world that's all brand-new,
Babies have so much to do!
Laughing, making funny faces,
Finding out those ticklish places...
Cuddling up and wiggling toes,
Looking cute in tiny clothes...
Tasting, touching, reaching high,
Crawling under, scooting by...
Learning words and having fun...
Making memories one by one.
Dear little bare feet, dimpled and white,
In your long nightgown wrapped up for the night;
Come, let me count all your sweet little toes,
Pink as the heart of a shell or a rose.
One is a lady who sits in the sun,
Two is a baby and three is a nun,
Four is a lily with innocent breast
Five is a birdie asleep in the nest.
Little hands and little feet,
Little toothless grins so sweet,
Little eyes that shine so bright,
Little arms to hold you tight.
What a wonderful Miracle from God!
There's a new little baby
at your house,
As sweet as a baby
can be...
Bringing such joy
and excitement
To a very nice family...
Promising wonderful moments
Of laughter, enjoyment,
and fun...
May your dreams
for a wonderful future
Be fulfilled
with your new "Little One"!
A new little baby
to cuddle and love
To spoil just a little
and think the world of,
A bundle from Heaven
to simply adore,
Now who in the world
could ask for more!
Ten tiny little fingers that always want to play,
That never stop exploring the wonder of today.
Ten tiny little fingers that from the very start,
Will reach out for tomorrow, yet always hold your heart.
Babies are always more trouble than you thought - and more wonderful than you ever dreamed. - Charles Osgood
Babies are blessings sent from above
Babies are bundles from heaven
A baby is a bit of star dust blown from the hand of God!
A baby is cuddles and tickles on toes,
A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. - Carl Sandburg
A baby is sunshine, is moonbeams and more... brightening your world like never before.
Baby's Poem
A gift from above,
A family treasure for all to love.
Ten tiny fingers wrapped in a ball,
One day soon you'll be big and tall.
Dreams cannot hold you small as today...
Your hand print and picture will hold it this way!
Children are one third of our population and all of our future. - The Promotion of Child Health, 1981
For this child I prayed, and the Lord has given me my petition which I asked of Him. - 1 Samuel 1:27
God lent us an angel, a gift from heaven above.
He/she will fill your lives with sunshine and your hearts with love.
A Man's Diaper Instructions:
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. - Jimmy Piersal, on How to Diaper a Baby, 1968
A precious new baby has come from above to live in your hearts and fill them with love
She/he will fill your lives with sunshine and your hearts with love.
Ten little fingers, ten perfect toes, fill your hearts with love that overflows.
Valentine's Day/Love Quotes
"Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be." ~ Robert Browning
"I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you." ~ Elizabeth Barrett Browning
"Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking together in the same direction..." ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupery
"If I know what love is, it is because of you..." ~ Herman Hesse
"Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love..." ~ Hamilton Wright Mabie
"Love doesn't make the world go 'round; love is what makes the ride worthwhile..." ~ Franklin P. Jones
"I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you." ~ Elizabeth Barrett Browning
"Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking together in the same direction..." ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupery
"If I know what love is, it is because of you..." ~ Herman Hesse
"Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love..." ~ Hamilton Wright Mabie
"Love doesn't make the world go 'round; love is what makes the ride worthwhile..." ~ Franklin P. Jones
Christmas Quotes
Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful. ~Norman Vincent Peale
Christmas is a time when you get homesick - even when you're home. ~Carol Nelson
He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree. ~Roy L. Smith
Christmas, children, is not a date. It is a state of mind. ~Mary Ellen Chase
The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other. ~Burton Hillis
There has been only one Christmas - the rest are anniversaries. ~W.J. Cameron
May Peace be your gift at Christmas and your blessing all year through! ~Author Unknown
I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. ~Charles Dickens
Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree. In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall. ~Larry Wilde, The Merry Book of Christmas
Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love! ~Hamilton Wright Mabie
Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen. ~Author unknown, attributed to a 7-year-old named Bobby
Remember
This December,
That love weighs more than gold!
~Josephine Dodge Daskam Bacon
A Christmas candle is a lovely thing;
It makes no noise at all,
But softly gives itself away.
~Eva Logue
Perhaps the best Yuletide decoration is being wreathed in smiles. ~Author Unknown
Sing hey! Sing hey!
For Christmas Day;
Twine mistletoe and holly.
For a friendship glows
In winter snows,
And so let's all be jolly!
~Author Unknown
At Christmas play and make good cheer,
For Christmas comes but once a year
~Thomas Tusser
Great little One! whose all-embracing birth
Lifts Earth to Heaven, stoops Heaven to Earth.
~Richard Crashaw
heard the bells on Christmas Day
Their old, familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet
The words repeat
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
The earth has grown old with its burden of care,
But at Christmas it always is young.
~Phillips Brooks
Wouldn't life be worth the living
Wouldn't dreams be coming true
If we kept the Christmas spirit
All the whole year through?
~Author Unknown
"I heard the bells on Christmas Day
Their old, familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Blessed is the season which engages the
whole world in a conspiracy of love."
~Hamilton Wright Mabie
From home to home, and heart to heart, from one place to another. The warmth and joy of Christmas, brings us closer to each other.
Emily Matthews
Christmas, children, is not a date. It is a state of mind.
Mary Ellen Chase
Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas.
Calvin Coolidge
Christians awake, salute the happy morn,
Whereon the Saviour of the world was born.
- John Byron 1692-1763
For unto you is born this day in the city of David, a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. -- Luke 2:11
What is Christmas? It is tenderness for the past, courage for the present, hope for the future. It is a fervent wish that every cup may overflow with blessings rich and eternal, and that every path may lead to peace. -- Agnes M. Pharo
It is Christmas in the heart that puts Christmas in the air.--W. T. Ellis
When Christmas bells are swinging above the fields of snow, We hear sweet voices ringing from lands of long ago, And etched on vacant places Are half-forgotten faces Of friends we used to cherish, and loves we used to know. --Ella Wheeler Wilcox
Then ye be glad, good people,
This night of all the year,
And light ye up your candles:
His star is shining near.
- Unknown
Love came down at Christmas,
Love all lovely, Love Divine;
Love was born at Christmas;
Star and angels gave the sign.
~Christina Rossetti
And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them,
and the glory of the Lord shone round about them:
and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto
them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good
tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.
For unto you is born this day in the city of David
a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall
be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped
in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly
there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly
host praising God, and saying,Glory to God in the
highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.
Luke 2:9-14
The joy of brightening other lives, bearing each
others' burdens, easing other's loads and supplanting
empty hearts and lives with generous gifts becomes for
us the magic of Christmas.
~W. C. Jones
And so, this Christmas season
may our hearts with gladness glow,
As we read the blessed story
That took place so long ago.--Alpha L. Buntain ("The First Christmas"
Christmas day is a day of joy and charity. May God make you very rich in both.--Phillips Brooks
Christmas is doing a little something extra for someone.--Charles Schulz
Christmas is for children. But it is for grownups too. Even if it is a headache, a chore, and nightmare, it is a period of necessary defrosting of chill and hide-bound hearts.--Lenora Mattingly Weber (Extension)
Christmas ... is not an eternal event at all, but a piece of one's home that one carries in one's heart...--Freya Stark ("The Wise Men" Time and Tide)
Christmas is sights, especially the sights of Christmas reflected in the eyes of a child.--William Saroyan
Christmas is the season for kindling the fire of hospitality in the hall, the genial flame of charity in the heart.--Washington Irving
Christmas is the season of joy, of holiday greetings exchanged, of gift-giving,and of families united.--Norman Vincent Peale
Christmas, my child, is love in action. ... Every time we love, every time we give, it's Christmas.--Dale Evans Rogers
The Christmas spirit--love--changes hearts and lives.--Pat Boone
The happiness and love on this one day
Bring thoughts which warm and cheer.
May we keep Christmas in our hearts
Through every day of all the year.--Gertrude B. Holman ("The Little Things at Christmas")
Jesus, the Light of the World, as we celebrate your birth ... may we begin to see the world in the light of understanding you give us.
A merry Christmas to everybody! A happy New Year to all the world!"--Charles Dickens
When the song of the angel is stilled,
When the star in the sky is gone,
When the kings and princes are home,
When the shepherds are back with their flock,
The work of Christmas begins:
To find the lost--To heal the broken--To feed the hungry--
To release the prisoner--To rebuild the nations--
To bring peace among brothers and sisters--
To make music in the heart.--Howard Thurman
Your friendship is a glowing ember
Through the year; and each December
From its warm and living spark
We kindle flame against the dark
And with its shining radiance light
Our tree of faith on Christmas night.--Thelma J. Lund
Christmas is a time when you get homesick - even when you're home. ~Carol Nelson
He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree. ~Roy L. Smith
Christmas, children, is not a date. It is a state of mind. ~Mary Ellen Chase
The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other. ~Burton Hillis
There has been only one Christmas - the rest are anniversaries. ~W.J. Cameron
May Peace be your gift at Christmas and your blessing all year through! ~Author Unknown
I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. ~Charles Dickens
Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree. In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall. ~Larry Wilde, The Merry Book of Christmas
Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love! ~Hamilton Wright Mabie
Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen. ~Author unknown, attributed to a 7-year-old named Bobby
Remember
This December,
That love weighs more than gold!
~Josephine Dodge Daskam Bacon
A Christmas candle is a lovely thing;
It makes no noise at all,
But softly gives itself away.
~Eva Logue
Perhaps the best Yuletide decoration is being wreathed in smiles. ~Author Unknown
Sing hey! Sing hey!
For Christmas Day;
Twine mistletoe and holly.
For a friendship glows
In winter snows,
And so let's all be jolly!
~Author Unknown
At Christmas play and make good cheer,
For Christmas comes but once a year
~Thomas Tusser
Great little One! whose all-embracing birth
Lifts Earth to Heaven, stoops Heaven to Earth.
~Richard Crashaw
heard the bells on Christmas Day
Their old, familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet
The words repeat
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
The earth has grown old with its burden of care,
But at Christmas it always is young.
~Phillips Brooks
Wouldn't life be worth the living
Wouldn't dreams be coming true
If we kept the Christmas spirit
All the whole year through?
~Author Unknown
"I heard the bells on Christmas Day
Their old, familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Blessed is the season which engages the
whole world in a conspiracy of love."
~Hamilton Wright Mabie
From home to home, and heart to heart, from one place to another. The warmth and joy of Christmas, brings us closer to each other.
Emily Matthews
Christmas, children, is not a date. It is a state of mind.
Mary Ellen Chase
Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas.
Calvin Coolidge
Christians awake, salute the happy morn,
Whereon the Saviour of the world was born.
- John Byron 1692-1763
For unto you is born this day in the city of David, a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. -- Luke 2:11
What is Christmas? It is tenderness for the past, courage for the present, hope for the future. It is a fervent wish that every cup may overflow with blessings rich and eternal, and that every path may lead to peace. -- Agnes M. Pharo
It is Christmas in the heart that puts Christmas in the air.--W. T. Ellis
When Christmas bells are swinging above the fields of snow, We hear sweet voices ringing from lands of long ago, And etched on vacant places Are half-forgotten faces Of friends we used to cherish, and loves we used to know. --Ella Wheeler Wilcox
Then ye be glad, good people,
This night of all the year,
And light ye up your candles:
His star is shining near.
- Unknown
Love came down at Christmas,
Love all lovely, Love Divine;
Love was born at Christmas;
Star and angels gave the sign.
~Christina Rossetti
And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them,
and the glory of the Lord shone round about them:
and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto
them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good
tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.
For unto you is born this day in the city of David
a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall
be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped
in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly
there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly
host praising God, and saying,Glory to God in the
highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.
Luke 2:9-14
The joy of brightening other lives, bearing each
others' burdens, easing other's loads and supplanting
empty hearts and lives with generous gifts becomes for
us the magic of Christmas.
~W. C. Jones
And so, this Christmas season
may our hearts with gladness glow,
As we read the blessed story
That took place so long ago.--Alpha L. Buntain ("The First Christmas"
Christmas day is a day of joy and charity. May God make you very rich in both.--Phillips Brooks
Christmas is doing a little something extra for someone.--Charles Schulz
Christmas is for children. But it is for grownups too. Even if it is a headache, a chore, and nightmare, it is a period of necessary defrosting of chill and hide-bound hearts.--Lenora Mattingly Weber (Extension)
Christmas ... is not an eternal event at all, but a piece of one's home that one carries in one's heart...--Freya Stark ("The Wise Men" Time and Tide)
Christmas is sights, especially the sights of Christmas reflected in the eyes of a child.--William Saroyan
Christmas is the season for kindling the fire of hospitality in the hall, the genial flame of charity in the heart.--Washington Irving
Christmas is the season of joy, of holiday greetings exchanged, of gift-giving,and of families united.--Norman Vincent Peale
Christmas, my child, is love in action. ... Every time we love, every time we give, it's Christmas.--Dale Evans Rogers
The Christmas spirit--love--changes hearts and lives.--Pat Boone
The happiness and love on this one day
Bring thoughts which warm and cheer.
May we keep Christmas in our hearts
Through every day of all the year.--Gertrude B. Holman ("The Little Things at Christmas")
Jesus, the Light of the World, as we celebrate your birth ... may we begin to see the world in the light of understanding you give us.
A merry Christmas to everybody! A happy New Year to all the world!"--Charles Dickens
When the song of the angel is stilled,
When the star in the sky is gone,
When the kings and princes are home,
When the shepherds are back with their flock,
The work of Christmas begins:
To find the lost--To heal the broken--To feed the hungry--
To release the prisoner--To rebuild the nations--
To bring peace among brothers and sisters--
To make music in the heart.--Howard Thurman
Your friendship is a glowing ember
Through the year; and each December
From its warm and living spark
We kindle flame against the dark
And with its shining radiance light
Our tree of faith on Christmas night.--Thelma J. Lund
Graduation Quotes
Dare to dream, dare to try,
dare to follow your heart.
Opportunity is calling
and graduation's the time to start.
As you seek new challenges
and make your dreams come true,
may this graduation day be a reminder
of all that you can do.
May you have joy on this your graduation day
Always have a sense of how unique you are
Never doubt how much you have to give
Have faith in your abilities
Follow your dreams in every day you live
You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.
You're on your own.
And you know what you know.
You are the guy (or gal) who'll decide where to go.
*Dr. Seuss*
dare to follow your heart.
Opportunity is calling
and graduation's the time to start.
As you seek new challenges
and make your dreams come true,
may this graduation day be a reminder
of all that you can do.
May you have joy on this your graduation day
Always have a sense of how unique you are
Never doubt how much you have to give
Have faith in your abilities
Follow your dreams in every day you live
You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.
You're on your own.
And you know what you know.
You are the guy (or gal) who'll decide where to go.
*Dr. Seuss*
Do what you love and what you would be willing to do for free, then do it so well that someone will be willing to be pay you to do it! -- Wynonna Judd
Everything you need is already inside - just do it.
"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are." -- Kurt Cobain
Friendship Quotes
"If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got."
Friends give full color to our lives.
The warmth of a friend's presence brings joy to our hearts, sunlight to our souls, and pleasure to all life.
Families are like fudge. Mostly sweet with a few nuts
The warmth of a friend's presence brings joy to our hearts, sunlight to our souls, and pleasure to all life.
Families are like fudge. Mostly sweet with a few nuts
Friends are the most important ingredient in this recipe of life."
"I get by with a little help from my friends." John Lennon
"It takes a long time to grow an old friend."
- by John Leonard
"The better part of one's life consists of his friendships."
- Abraham Lincoln
"Friends are the Bacon Bits in the Salad Bowl of Life."
- "Pizza Place Sign", (sent by Rory Bristol)
"Friends are God's way of taking care of us.
Friends are like Peanut Butter ... it sticks to the roof of your mouth .like a friend sticks to you.... and it feels as if they never go away.!"
"Friendship is like thighs, they are always sticking together
"Most people come into our lives and quickly leave. It is the special few that come in and leave a footprint in our hearts. and we are forever changed."
Friends are like flowers, beautiful flowers; friends are like flowers in the garden of life."
The best things in life aren't things...they're friends
"Friends are like chocolate, they are sweet and wonderful- and like it's calories, they stick with you."
Into every life a little rain must fall ….
Call me anytime you need an umbrella.
Friends are the umbrellas in the storms of life
Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to Fly.
"I get by with a little help from my friends." John Lennon
"It takes a long time to grow an old friend."
- by John Leonard
"The better part of one's life consists of his friendships."
- Abraham Lincoln
"Friends are the Bacon Bits in the Salad Bowl of Life."
- "Pizza Place Sign", (sent by Rory Bristol)
"Friends are God's way of taking care of us.
Friends are like Peanut Butter ... it sticks to the roof of your mouth .like a friend sticks to you.... and it feels as if they never go away.!"
"Friendship is like thighs, they are always sticking together
"Most people come into our lives and quickly leave. It is the special few that come in and leave a footprint in our hearts. and we are forever changed."
Friends are like flowers, beautiful flowers; friends are like flowers in the garden of life."
The best things in life aren't things...they're friends
"Friends are like chocolate, they are sweet and wonderful- and like it's calories, they stick with you."
Into every life a little rain must fall ….
Call me anytime you need an umbrella.
Friends are the umbrellas in the storms of life
Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to Fly.
Food and Beverage Quotes
Instant human -- just add coffee!
When life gives you beans -- make coffee!
Given enough coffee I could rule the world!
When life gives you beans -- make coffee!
Given enough coffee I could rule the world!
Simply put... everyone has a price, mine is chocolate
The 12-step chocoholics program:
NEVER BE MORE THAN 12 STEPS AWAY FROM CHOCOLATE!
A chocolate in the mouth is worth two on the plate.
If it ain't chocolate, it ain't breakfast!
There's nothing better than a good friend, except a good friend with CHOCOLATE
Chocolate causes certain endocrine glands to secrete hormones that affect your feelings and behavior by making you happy. Therefore, it counteracts depression, in turn reducing the stress of depression. Your stress-free life helps you maintain a youthful disposition, both physically and mentally. So, eat lots of chocolate! Elaine Sherman, Book of Divine Indulgences
Forget love-- I'd rather fall in chocolate!!!
I never met a chocolate I didn't like. Deanna Troi in Star Trek: The Next Generation
Nobody knows the truffles I've seen!
Exercise is a dirty word... Every time I hear it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
Chocolate is good for three things. Two of 'em cannot be mentioned on public television.
I could give up chocolate but I'm not a quitter.
Put the chocolate in the bag and nobody gets hurt.
I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process.... It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance?
Life is like a box of chocolates - you never know what you're going to get. Forrest Gump in "Forrest Gump" (1994)
If life is like a box of chocolates, then its time for me to buy another box, I seemed to have already devoured all the good ones!
Life is like a box of chocolates, the best ones are half eaten!!
In the beginning, the Lord created chocolate, and he saw that it was good. Then he separated the light from the dark, and it was better.
Chocolate - The breakfast of champions!
If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devasated.
Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.
Chocolate doesn't make the world go around ... but it certainly makes the ride worthwhile!
Man cannot live on chocolate alone; but woman sure can.
Coffee.... Chocolate.... Men....
Some things are just better when they're rich!
I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process....
It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance?
Just give me the chocolate and no one gets hurt!
1. Chocolate is the answer. Who cares what the question is!
1. When life gets you down and nothing is going right, you always have a friend ... in chocolate.
1. To have one’s diet defeated by chocolate is a delectable defeat.
2. God sends no stress that prayer and chocolate cannot handle!
3. When the going gets tough, the tough get chocolate.
4. Save Earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.
The 12-step chocoholics program:
NEVER BE MORE THAN 12 STEPS AWAY FROM CHOCOLATE!
A chocolate in the mouth is worth two on the plate.
If it ain't chocolate, it ain't breakfast!
There's nothing better than a good friend, except a good friend with CHOCOLATE
Chocolate causes certain endocrine glands to secrete hormones that affect your feelings and behavior by making you happy. Therefore, it counteracts depression, in turn reducing the stress of depression. Your stress-free life helps you maintain a youthful disposition, both physically and mentally. So, eat lots of chocolate! Elaine Sherman, Book of Divine Indulgences
Forget love-- I'd rather fall in chocolate!!!
I never met a chocolate I didn't like. Deanna Troi in Star Trek: The Next Generation
Nobody knows the truffles I've seen!
Exercise is a dirty word... Every time I hear it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
Chocolate is good for three things. Two of 'em cannot be mentioned on public television.
I could give up chocolate but I'm not a quitter.
Put the chocolate in the bag and nobody gets hurt.
I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process.... It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance?
Life is like a box of chocolates - you never know what you're going to get. Forrest Gump in "Forrest Gump" (1994)
If life is like a box of chocolates, then its time for me to buy another box, I seemed to have already devoured all the good ones!
Life is like a box of chocolates, the best ones are half eaten!!
In the beginning, the Lord created chocolate, and he saw that it was good. Then he separated the light from the dark, and it was better.
Chocolate - The breakfast of champions!
If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devasated.
Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.
Chocolate doesn't make the world go around ... but it certainly makes the ride worthwhile!
Man cannot live on chocolate alone; but woman sure can.
Coffee.... Chocolate.... Men....
Some things are just better when they're rich!
I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process....
It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance?
Just give me the chocolate and no one gets hurt!
1. Chocolate is the answer. Who cares what the question is!
1. When life gets you down and nothing is going right, you always have a friend ... in chocolate.
1. To have one’s diet defeated by chocolate is a delectable defeat.
2. God sends no stress that prayer and chocolate cannot handle!
3. When the going gets tough, the tough get chocolate.
4. Save Earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.
Butterflies and Insects Quotes
The butterfly is a flying flower,
The flower a tethered butterfly.
Wishing you butterfly mornings...and wildflower afternoons.
When a small child, I thought that success spelled happiness. I was wrong, happiness is like a butterfly which appears and delights us for one brief moment, but soon flits away."
-Anna Pavlova
Russian ballerina and choreographer
You give me wings
of gladness and lend
my spirit song.
--Sydney K. Russell
A Child
A child is like a butterfly in the wind
Some can fly higher than others,
But each one flies the best it can.
Why compare one against the other?
Each one is different.
Each one is special.
Each one is beautiful.
-Author Unknown
Happiness is a butterfly, which when pursued is always beyond our grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.
- Nathaniel Hawthorne
The flower a tethered butterfly.
Wishing you butterfly mornings...and wildflower afternoons.
When a small child, I thought that success spelled happiness. I was wrong, happiness is like a butterfly which appears and delights us for one brief moment, but soon flits away."
-Anna Pavlova
Russian ballerina and choreographer
You give me wings
of gladness and lend
my spirit song.
--Sydney K. Russell
A Child
A child is like a butterfly in the wind
Some can fly higher than others,
But each one flies the best it can.
Why compare one against the other?
Each one is different.
Each one is special.
Each one is beautiful.
-Author Unknown
Happiness is a butterfly, which when pursued is always beyond our grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.
- Nathaniel Hawthorne
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Birthday Quotes
"Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time." ~ Jean Paul Richter
"You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake." ~ Bob Hope
"A true friend remembers your birthday but not your age."
"A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip."
Blow your horn – it’s the day you were born.
Why is a birthday cake the only food you can blow on and spit on and everybody rushes to get a piece?
-- Bobby Kelton
There is still no cure for the common birthday. John Glenn
Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again.
--Menachem Mendel Schneerson
Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time.
~Jean Paul Richter
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.
--Larry Lorenzoni
Humor??
Old age is always 15 years older than I am. ~ Bernard Baruch
May you live all the days of your life.
~Jonathan Swift
Humor?
Inside every older person is a younger person - wondering what the hell happened.
~Cora Harvey Armstrong
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's
birthday but never remembers her age.
~Robert Frost
You are only young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime.
~John P. Grier
Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
~C.E.M. Joad
Let us respect gray hairs, especially our own.
~J. P. Sears
Age is a high price to pay for maturity.
~Tom Stoppard
Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
~Jack Benny
Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you've got to start young.
~Fred Astaire
Whatever with the past has gone,
The best is always yet to come.
~Lucy Larcom
Sing a song of Birthdays
Full of fun and cheer
And may you keep on having them
For many a happy year. – Anonymous
The years between fifty and seventy are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down. - T. S. Eliot
From birth to age eighteen, a girl needs good parents. From eighteen to thirty-five, she needs good looks. From thirty-five to fifty-five, she needs a good personality. From fifty-five on, she needs good cash.
~Sophie Tucker
Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.
~Bob Hope
There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval.
~George Santayana
You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
~Bob Hope
Christmas is the season for kindling the fire of hospitality in the hall, the genial flame of charity in the heart.
~Washington Irving
We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. ~Jean Paul Richter
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. ~Lucille Ball
Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. ~Jennifer Yane
Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. ~Tom Wilson
40 quotes
She's pretty,
She's fine,
but she's not 39!
Life begins at 40 – but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.
“Forty isn't old, if you're a tree”
The best years of a woman's life - the ten years between 39 and 40”
What most persons consider as virtue, after the age of 40 is simply a loss of energy”
Forty is the old age of youth; fifty is the youth of old age.”
To me, old age is always fifteen years older than I am.”
Seen it all, done it all,
can't remember most of it.
Some lives, like evening primroses,
blossom most beautifully in the
evening of life.
Age is a matter of mind; if you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
How To Know You're Getting Older: Everything hurts. And what doesn't hurt, doesn't work. You feel like the morning after, and you haven't been anywhere. You join the health club and don't go. You need your glasses to find your glasses. Your back goes out more that you do. Your knees buckle but your belt won't. Your mind makes contracts your body can't meet. Dialing long distance wears you out. Your children begin to look middle aged. The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals. You look forward to a dull evening. You know all the answers but nobody asks you the questions. You have too much room in the house but not enough in the medicine chest. You stop looking forward to your next birthday, but you're glad when it arrives.
--Elizabeth Lucas
Youth is a gift of nature, but age is a work of art. Judy Barry
It's your birthday and anything you want to do is okay by me...
I've heard how cranky old people get when they don't get their way!
To be 70 years young is sometimes far more cheerful and hopeful than to be 40 years old. Oliver Wendal Homes Jr.
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. -- Lucille ball
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. -- Robert Frost
Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter. -- Jack Benny
The Best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. -- H. V. Prochnow
The older the fiddler, the sweeter the tune. -- English Proverb
To me, old age is always fifteen years older than I am. -- Bernard M. Baruch
Those whom the gods love grow young. -- Oscar Wilde
It takes a long time to grow young. -- Pablo Picasso
I am not young enough to know everything. -- Oscar Wilde
Birthdays are good for you; the more you have the longer you live! -- Unknown
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. -- Ogden Nash
If you want to be happy, be. -- Henry David Thorreau
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. -- Reverend Larry Lorenzoni
You've heard of the three ages of man - youth, age, and "you are looking wonderful." -- Francis Cardinal Spellman
In the midst of winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer. -- Albert Camus
The old believe everything; the middle-aged suspect everything; the young know everything. -- Oscar Wilde
You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. -- Bob Hope
All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific. -- Jane Wagner
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. -- Bob Hope
The really frightening thing about middle age is that you know you'll grow out of it. -- Doris Day
It is utterly false and cruelly arbitrary to put all the play and learning into childhood, all the work into middle age, and all the regrets into old age. -- Margaret Mead
Youth had been a habit of hers for so long that she could not part with it. -- Rudyard Kipling
Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens. -- Jimi Hendrix
Home is where you keep your "stuff" while you're out getting more "stuff". -- George Carlin
Nature gives you the face you have at twenty, but it's up to you to merit the face you have at fifty. -- Coco Chanel
Women deserve to have more than twelve years between the ages of twenty eight and forty. -- James Thurber.
We are always the same age inside. -- Gertrude Stein
At twenty years of age, the will reigns; at thirty, the wit; and at forty, the judgment. -- Benjamin Franklin
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. -- Charles Schultz
Please don't retouch my wrinkles. It took me so long to earn them. -- Anna Magnani
Youth has no age. -- Pablo Picasso
Grow old along with me! The best is yet to be.... -- Robert Browning
Happiness is good health and a bad memory. -- Ingrid Bergman
Birth may be a matter of a moment, but it is a unique one. -- Frederick Leboyer
Youth is the gift of nature, but age is the work of art. -- Garson Kanin
Keep true to the dream of thy youth. -- Friedrich Von Schiller
Whatever with the past has gone, the best is always yet to come. -- Lucy Larcom
Time draweth wrinkles in a fair face, but addeth fresh colors to a fast friend. -- John Lyle
Youth comes but once in a lifetime. -- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
There are days of oldness, and then one gets young again. -- Katherine Butler Hathaway
At middle age the soul should be opening up like a rose, not closing up like a cabbage. -- John Andrew Holmes
Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning. -- Bob Hope
You take all the experience and judgment of men over fifty out of the world and there wouldn't be enough left to run it. -- Henry Ford
Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard there is nothing you can do about it.-- Golda Meir
It's sad to grow old, but nice to ripen. -- Brigitte Bardot
Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else. -- Ogden Nash
Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been. -- Mark Twain
If you want to look young and thin, hang around old fat people. -- Jim Eason
The older I grow the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom. -- Henry L. Mencken
For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday. -- John Glenn
Those whom the gods love grow young. -- Oscar Wilde
The lovely thing about being forty is that you can appreciate twenty-five-year-old men. -- Colleen McCullough
You will recognize, my boy, the first sign of old age: it is when you go out into the streets of London and realize for the first time how young the policemen look. -- Sir Seymour Hicks
What could be more beautiful than a dear old lady growing wise with age? Every age can be enchanting, provided you live within it. -- Brigitte Bardot
Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation. -- Unknown
Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative. -- Maurice Chevalier
Try to keep your soul young and quivering right up to old age. -- George Sand
The manner of giving is worth more than the gift. -- Pierre Cornielle
When I passed forty I dropped pretense, ‘cause men like women who got some sense. -- Maya Angelou
Sooner or later we all discover that the important moments in life are not the advertised ones, not the birthdays, the graduations, the weddings, not the great goals achieved. The real milestones are less prepossessing. They come to the door of memory unannounced, stray dogs that amble in, sniff around a bit and simply never leave. Our lives are measured by these. -- Susan B. Anthony
PLeas'd to look forward, pleas'd to look behind, and count each birthday with a grateful mind. -- Alexander Pope
Very early, I knew that the only object in life was to grow. -- Margaret Fuller
To me, old age is always ten years older than I am. -- John Burroughs
Most of us can remember a time when a birthday, especially if it was one's own, brightened the world as if a second sun has risen. -- Robert Lynd
It is lovely, when I forget all birthdays, including my own, to find that somebody remembers me. -- Ellen Glasgow
Youth is happy because it has the ability to see beauty. Anyone who keeps the ability to see beauty never grows old. -- Franz Kafka
There was a star danced, and under that was I born. -- William Shakespeare
One of the signs of passing youth is the birth of a sense of fellowship with other human beings as we take our place among them. -- Virginia Woolf
The spiritual eyesight improves as the physical eyesight declines. – Plato
Lead me not into temptation; I can find it myself. -- Unknown
I am long on ideas, but short on time. I expect to live to be only about a hundred. -- Thomas Alva Edison
Forty is the old age of youth; fifty is the youth of old age. -- French proverb
I love everything that's old: old friends, old times, old manners, old books, old wines. -- Oliver Goldsmith
Age is not measured by years. Nature does not equally distribute energy. Some people are born old and tired while others are going strong at seventy. -- Dorothy Thompson
Of middle age, the best that can be said is that a middle-aged person has likely learned how to have a little fun in spite of his troubles. -- Don Marquis
Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter. -- Mark Twain
We grow too soon old and too late smart. -- Pennsylvania Dutch proverb
Men grow old, pearls grow yellow, there is no cure for it. -- Chinese proverb
Blessed is the person who is too busy to worry in the daytime and too sleepy to worry at night. -- Unknown
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. -- Groucho Marx
Today is the yesterday you worried about tomorrow. -- Unknown
If you survive long enough, you're revered-rather like an old building. -- Katherine Hepburn
Be kind to your kids, they'll be choosing your nursing home. -- Unknown
A diamond cannot be polished without friction, nor a man perfected without trials. -- Chinese Proverb
I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see. -- John Burroughs
Sing a song of Birthdays
Full of fun and cheer
And may you keep on having them
For many a happy year. -- Anonymous
want to be an artist
To paint pictures just for you,
So when each birthday comes around,
I can send you quite a few. – Anonymous
A man of forty today has nothing to worry him but falling hair, inability to button the top button, failing vision, shortness of breath, a tendency of the collar to shut off all breathing, trembling of the kidneys to whatever tune the orchestra is playing, and a general sense of giddiness when the matter of rent is brought up. Forty is Life's Golden Age. - Robert Benchley
http://www.mothers.net/motherssayings.htm
To be seventy years young is something far more
cheerful and hopeful than to be forty years old.
Celebrating a birthday is exalting life and being glad for it. On a birthday, we do not say: 'Thanks for what you did, or said, or accomplished.' No, we say: 'Thank you for being born and being among us.' Celebrating a birthday reminds us of the goodness of life. Henri J. M. Nouwen
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip!
THere are three hundred and sixty-four days when you might get un-birthday presents...and only one for birthday presents, you know.
--Lewis Carroll
A birthday is a day filled with special joy, a day
that lets you know you're always loved and cherished.
A birthday is a time to plan ahead and to dream
of all the beautiful things that life has to offer.
Most of us can remember
a time when a birthday--
especially if it was one's own--
brightened the world
as if a second sun had risen.
--Robert Lynd
After all, what are birthdays?
Here today and gone tomorrow. Eeyore (A. A. Milne)
All that you hope for...
All that you dream of...
All that makes you happy...
...that's what your wished --
on your birthday and always.
Find delight in the simplest things.
Today and everyday.
And have the happiest of birthdays.
A birthday brings such fun and cheer too bad we have but one each year
Birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake
Birthdays are ordinary days
sprinkled with stardust
Birthdays give us the opportunities to stop and appreciate,
all the beautiful things we have been blessed with.
Celebrate this day, and embrace all the reasons to believe in wishes again. Flavia
Celebrating a birthday reminds us of the goodness of life, and in this spirit we really need to celebrate people’s birthdays every day, by showing gratitude, kindness, forgiveness, gentleness, and affection. These are ways of saying: “It’s good that you are alive; it’s good that you are walking with me on this earth. Let’s be glad and rejoice. This is the day God has made for us to be and to be together.”
Henri J.M. Nouwen
Real birthdays are not annual affairs.
Real birthdays are the days when we have
a new birth.
--Ralph Parlette
Sooner or later we all discover that the important moments in life are not the advertised ones, not the birthdays, the graduations, the weddings, not the great goals achieved. The real milestones are less prepossessing. They come to the door of memory unannounced, stray dogs that amble in, sniff around a bit, and simply never leave. Our lives are measured by these.
Susan B. Anthony
Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the
sun every year.
Have an awesome day, and know that someone who thinks you're great has
thought about you today!.. "And that person was me."
60th Birthday
You can take no credit for
beauty at sixteen. But if you are
beautiful at sixty, it will be
your soul's own doing. Marie Stopes
"You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake." ~ Bob Hope
"A true friend remembers your birthday but not your age."
"A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip."
Blow your horn – it’s the day you were born.
Why is a birthday cake the only food you can blow on and spit on and everybody rushes to get a piece?
-- Bobby Kelton
There is still no cure for the common birthday. John Glenn
Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again.
--Menachem Mendel Schneerson
Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time.
~Jean Paul Richter
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.
--Larry Lorenzoni
Humor??
Old age is always 15 years older than I am. ~ Bernard Baruch
May you live all the days of your life.
~Jonathan Swift
Humor?
Inside every older person is a younger person - wondering what the hell happened.
~Cora Harvey Armstrong
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's
birthday but never remembers her age.
~Robert Frost
You are only young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime.
~John P. Grier
Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
~C.E.M. Joad
Let us respect gray hairs, especially our own.
~J. P. Sears
Age is a high price to pay for maturity.
~Tom Stoppard
Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
~Jack Benny
Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you've got to start young.
~Fred Astaire
Whatever with the past has gone,
The best is always yet to come.
~Lucy Larcom
Sing a song of Birthdays
Full of fun and cheer
And may you keep on having them
For many a happy year. – Anonymous
The years between fifty and seventy are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down. - T. S. Eliot
From birth to age eighteen, a girl needs good parents. From eighteen to thirty-five, she needs good looks. From thirty-five to fifty-five, she needs a good personality. From fifty-five on, she needs good cash.
~Sophie Tucker
Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.
~Bob Hope
There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval.
~George Santayana
You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
~Bob Hope
Christmas is the season for kindling the fire of hospitality in the hall, the genial flame of charity in the heart.
~Washington Irving
We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. ~Jean Paul Richter
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. ~Lucille Ball
Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. ~Jennifer Yane
Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. ~Tom Wilson
40 quotes
She's pretty,
She's fine,
but she's not 39!
Life begins at 40 – but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.
“Forty isn't old, if you're a tree”
The best years of a woman's life - the ten years between 39 and 40”
What most persons consider as virtue, after the age of 40 is simply a loss of energy”
Forty is the old age of youth; fifty is the youth of old age.”
To me, old age is always fifteen years older than I am.”
Seen it all, done it all,
can't remember most of it.
Some lives, like evening primroses,
blossom most beautifully in the
evening of life.
Age is a matter of mind; if you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
How To Know You're Getting Older: Everything hurts. And what doesn't hurt, doesn't work. You feel like the morning after, and you haven't been anywhere. You join the health club and don't go. You need your glasses to find your glasses. Your back goes out more that you do. Your knees buckle but your belt won't. Your mind makes contracts your body can't meet. Dialing long distance wears you out. Your children begin to look middle aged. The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals. You look forward to a dull evening. You know all the answers but nobody asks you the questions. You have too much room in the house but not enough in the medicine chest. You stop looking forward to your next birthday, but you're glad when it arrives.
--Elizabeth Lucas
Youth is a gift of nature, but age is a work of art. Judy Barry
It's your birthday and anything you want to do is okay by me...
I've heard how cranky old people get when they don't get their way!
To be 70 years young is sometimes far more cheerful and hopeful than to be 40 years old. Oliver Wendal Homes Jr.
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. -- Lucille ball
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. -- Robert Frost
Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter. -- Jack Benny
The Best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. -- H. V. Prochnow
The older the fiddler, the sweeter the tune. -- English Proverb
To me, old age is always fifteen years older than I am. -- Bernard M. Baruch
Those whom the gods love grow young. -- Oscar Wilde
It takes a long time to grow young. -- Pablo Picasso
I am not young enough to know everything. -- Oscar Wilde
Birthdays are good for you; the more you have the longer you live! -- Unknown
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. -- Ogden Nash
If you want to be happy, be. -- Henry David Thorreau
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. -- Reverend Larry Lorenzoni
You've heard of the three ages of man - youth, age, and "you are looking wonderful." -- Francis Cardinal Spellman
In the midst of winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer. -- Albert Camus
The old believe everything; the middle-aged suspect everything; the young know everything. -- Oscar Wilde
You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. -- Bob Hope
All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific. -- Jane Wagner
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. -- Bob Hope
The really frightening thing about middle age is that you know you'll grow out of it. -- Doris Day
It is utterly false and cruelly arbitrary to put all the play and learning into childhood, all the work into middle age, and all the regrets into old age. -- Margaret Mead
Youth had been a habit of hers for so long that she could not part with it. -- Rudyard Kipling
Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens. -- Jimi Hendrix
Home is where you keep your "stuff" while you're out getting more "stuff". -- George Carlin
Nature gives you the face you have at twenty, but it's up to you to merit the face you have at fifty. -- Coco Chanel
Women deserve to have more than twelve years between the ages of twenty eight and forty. -- James Thurber.
We are always the same age inside. -- Gertrude Stein
At twenty years of age, the will reigns; at thirty, the wit; and at forty, the judgment. -- Benjamin Franklin
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. -- Charles Schultz
Please don't retouch my wrinkles. It took me so long to earn them. -- Anna Magnani
Youth has no age. -- Pablo Picasso
Grow old along with me! The best is yet to be.... -- Robert Browning
Happiness is good health and a bad memory. -- Ingrid Bergman
Birth may be a matter of a moment, but it is a unique one. -- Frederick Leboyer
Youth is the gift of nature, but age is the work of art. -- Garson Kanin
Keep true to the dream of thy youth. -- Friedrich Von Schiller
Whatever with the past has gone, the best is always yet to come. -- Lucy Larcom
Time draweth wrinkles in a fair face, but addeth fresh colors to a fast friend. -- John Lyle
Youth comes but once in a lifetime. -- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
There are days of oldness, and then one gets young again. -- Katherine Butler Hathaway
At middle age the soul should be opening up like a rose, not closing up like a cabbage. -- John Andrew Holmes
Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning. -- Bob Hope
You take all the experience and judgment of men over fifty out of the world and there wouldn't be enough left to run it. -- Henry Ford
Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard there is nothing you can do about it.-- Golda Meir
It's sad to grow old, but nice to ripen. -- Brigitte Bardot
Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else. -- Ogden Nash
Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been. -- Mark Twain
If you want to look young and thin, hang around old fat people. -- Jim Eason
The older I grow the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom. -- Henry L. Mencken
For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday. -- John Glenn
Those whom the gods love grow young. -- Oscar Wilde
The lovely thing about being forty is that you can appreciate twenty-five-year-old men. -- Colleen McCullough
You will recognize, my boy, the first sign of old age: it is when you go out into the streets of London and realize for the first time how young the policemen look. -- Sir Seymour Hicks
What could be more beautiful than a dear old lady growing wise with age? Every age can be enchanting, provided you live within it. -- Brigitte Bardot
Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation. -- Unknown
Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative. -- Maurice Chevalier
Try to keep your soul young and quivering right up to old age. -- George Sand
The manner of giving is worth more than the gift. -- Pierre Cornielle
When I passed forty I dropped pretense, ‘cause men like women who got some sense. -- Maya Angelou
Sooner or later we all discover that the important moments in life are not the advertised ones, not the birthdays, the graduations, the weddings, not the great goals achieved. The real milestones are less prepossessing. They come to the door of memory unannounced, stray dogs that amble in, sniff around a bit and simply never leave. Our lives are measured by these. -- Susan B. Anthony
PLeas'd to look forward, pleas'd to look behind, and count each birthday with a grateful mind. -- Alexander Pope
Very early, I knew that the only object in life was to grow. -- Margaret Fuller
To me, old age is always ten years older than I am. -- John Burroughs
Most of us can remember a time when a birthday, especially if it was one's own, brightened the world as if a second sun has risen. -- Robert Lynd
It is lovely, when I forget all birthdays, including my own, to find that somebody remembers me. -- Ellen Glasgow
Youth is happy because it has the ability to see beauty. Anyone who keeps the ability to see beauty never grows old. -- Franz Kafka
There was a star danced, and under that was I born. -- William Shakespeare
One of the signs of passing youth is the birth of a sense of fellowship with other human beings as we take our place among them. -- Virginia Woolf
The spiritual eyesight improves as the physical eyesight declines. – Plato
Lead me not into temptation; I can find it myself. -- Unknown
I am long on ideas, but short on time. I expect to live to be only about a hundred. -- Thomas Alva Edison
Forty is the old age of youth; fifty is the youth of old age. -- French proverb
I love everything that's old: old friends, old times, old manners, old books, old wines. -- Oliver Goldsmith
Age is not measured by years. Nature does not equally distribute energy. Some people are born old and tired while others are going strong at seventy. -- Dorothy Thompson
Of middle age, the best that can be said is that a middle-aged person has likely learned how to have a little fun in spite of his troubles. -- Don Marquis
Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter. -- Mark Twain
We grow too soon old and too late smart. -- Pennsylvania Dutch proverb
Men grow old, pearls grow yellow, there is no cure for it. -- Chinese proverb
Blessed is the person who is too busy to worry in the daytime and too sleepy to worry at night. -- Unknown
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. -- Groucho Marx
Today is the yesterday you worried about tomorrow. -- Unknown
If you survive long enough, you're revered-rather like an old building. -- Katherine Hepburn
Be kind to your kids, they'll be choosing your nursing home. -- Unknown
A diamond cannot be polished without friction, nor a man perfected without trials. -- Chinese Proverb
I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see. -- John Burroughs
Sing a song of Birthdays
Full of fun and cheer
And may you keep on having them
For many a happy year. -- Anonymous
want to be an artist
To paint pictures just for you,
So when each birthday comes around,
I can send you quite a few. – Anonymous
A man of forty today has nothing to worry him but falling hair, inability to button the top button, failing vision, shortness of breath, a tendency of the collar to shut off all breathing, trembling of the kidneys to whatever tune the orchestra is playing, and a general sense of giddiness when the matter of rent is brought up. Forty is Life's Golden Age. - Robert Benchley
http://www.mothers.net/motherssayings.htm
To be seventy years young is something far more
cheerful and hopeful than to be forty years old.
Celebrating a birthday is exalting life and being glad for it. On a birthday, we do not say: 'Thanks for what you did, or said, or accomplished.' No, we say: 'Thank you for being born and being among us.' Celebrating a birthday reminds us of the goodness of life. Henri J. M. Nouwen
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip!
THere are three hundred and sixty-four days when you might get un-birthday presents...and only one for birthday presents, you know.
--Lewis Carroll
A birthday is a day filled with special joy, a day
that lets you know you're always loved and cherished.
A birthday is a time to plan ahead and to dream
of all the beautiful things that life has to offer.
Most of us can remember
a time when a birthday--
especially if it was one's own--
brightened the world
as if a second sun had risen.
--Robert Lynd
After all, what are birthdays?
Here today and gone tomorrow. Eeyore (A. A. Milne)
All that you hope for...
All that you dream of...
All that makes you happy...
...that's what your wished --
on your birthday and always.
Find delight in the simplest things.
Today and everyday.
And have the happiest of birthdays.
A birthday brings such fun and cheer too bad we have but one each year
Birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake
Birthdays are ordinary days
sprinkled with stardust
Birthdays give us the opportunities to stop and appreciate,
all the beautiful things we have been blessed with.
Celebrate this day, and embrace all the reasons to believe in wishes again. Flavia
Celebrating a birthday reminds us of the goodness of life, and in this spirit we really need to celebrate people’s birthdays every day, by showing gratitude, kindness, forgiveness, gentleness, and affection. These are ways of saying: “It’s good that you are alive; it’s good that you are walking with me on this earth. Let’s be glad and rejoice. This is the day God has made for us to be and to be together.”
Henri J.M. Nouwen
Real birthdays are not annual affairs.
Real birthdays are the days when we have
a new birth.
--Ralph Parlette
Sooner or later we all discover that the important moments in life are not the advertised ones, not the birthdays, the graduations, the weddings, not the great goals achieved. The real milestones are less prepossessing. They come to the door of memory unannounced, stray dogs that amble in, sniff around a bit, and simply never leave. Our lives are measured by these.
Susan B. Anthony
Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the
sun every year.
Have an awesome day, and know that someone who thinks you're great has
thought about you today!.. "And that person was me."
60th Birthday
You can take no credit for
beauty at sixteen. But if you are
beautiful at sixty, it will be
your soul's own doing. Marie Stopes
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